Chapter Thirteen
COCO
"Ano ba 'tong gulong ginawa mo?" Drey, my twin sister asked as she paced back and forth. "Nag-away pa si Dad at si Tito Axel ng dahil sa inyo. Alam namin lahat na gago ka, but this time you took it to a whole new level."
So Ma and Dad broke the news to my siblings. Nagulat sila ng makita nila si Dad na kinakaladkad ni Mama papasok ng bahay na may pasa at dugo sa mukha. They decided it was time to tell them that we were going to have a new addition to the family.
"It's not that bad. Ayaw mo nun magiging Tita ka na?" I asked.
"I'm going to be a Tita too?" Ronnie excitedly said.
"Yeah. You're going to be a Tita too." Sabi ko.
"Yay! I'm gonna be the best aunt. I swear!" She promised.
"See! The kid's happy about it! You should be too." I shook my head.
"Are you retarded? Look at what happened to Dad! Ikaw ang may kasalanan nito." She shrieked, pointing at him while Mama cleaned the cuts and bruises on his face. "Hindi mo ba alam ang ginawa mo? Bakit si Anais pa? How come we didn't even know about this?"
"I'm sorry. I didn't know you were supposed to know. Hayaan mo bibili akong logbook para lang sa'yo. I'll write down every intercourse we've had kasama ang date, time, pati position." I sarcastically said.
"Your language, Nicholas. May bata dito." Ma said in a low but firm voice. She didn't look happy. Nope. Not one bit. "I've held my tongue for too long because I didn't want to stress you out while you're recovering from your injuries. Hindi ka na nahiya sa mga magulang ni Anais? How could you do this to them? To us?"
"Bakit? Nahiya ba yung gagong yun sa akin ng halos patayin niya na anak ko?" Dad said.
"Isa ka pa! Kaya namimihasa yang anak mo!" Diniin ni Mama ang cotton ball sa pasa ni Dad. He grunted in pain and pulled his face away. "Imbes na pagsabihan mo, kinukunsinti mo. Pareho kayong mag-ama, ang gaspang ng ugali niyo. At akala mo makakalimutan ko yung sinabi mo? I don't like what you said about Anais. She's a kid, Nick. That was uncalled for. Sana hindi mo na sinabi yun ng hindi nag-init lalo ang ulo ni Axel."
"Yeah, Dad." I agreed. "You shouldn't have said that."
"Hey, akala ko tayo ang magkakampi dito?" He frowned.
"You are so immature, Phoenix! Tumatanda kang paurong." Ma angrily pressed the cotton ball on the bruise on his corner of his lips.
"Pinagtanggol ko lang ang anak ko! I won't just sit there and take all the insult Axel's throwing at him. Mas masakit sa akin iyon! That's my son, Cassie. He came from my own groin!"
"Dad." Disgusted, I made a face.
"I know." Ma's voice was more gentle this time. "Pero kailangan din natin tanggapin na nagkamali din si Coco. I know they both wanted it but Anais is younger than him, he should've known better. Babae pa yung sa kanila. We have daughters too. Ano na lang ang mararamdaman mo kung sa kanila nangyari iyon?"
"Don't even say that." Dad's jaw clenched.
"Exactly," Mama said. "Hindi ko sinasabi na tama ang ginawa ni Axel sa anak natin pero aminin man natin o hindi, mas may kasalanan siya. Nangyari na, Nick. Our son got Anais pregnant. Nabugbog na siya ni Axel. Hindi makakatulong yung pag-aaway niyo sa sitwasyon. You're only making it worse."
Dad's hand reached over to touch Mama's face. "Cass, kung sinasabi mo sa akin na makipag-ayos ako sa kanya it's not going to happen. Hilingin mo na sa akin ang lahat huwag lang yan. I will not make peace with an unevolved caveman who wants to kill my son."
I stroked Anais' hair as she cuddle next to me. We were talking about how we were like Romeo and Juliet with our Dads feuding against each other. Except we weren't lovers. We'd never been and we'd never be. We were just friends. Bestfriends. That's all we'd ever be.
"Hey, Coco..." Nag-angat siya ng tingin sa akin.
"Yeah?"
"Kahit ano'ng mangyari promise me hindi masisira ang friendship natin." She said.
"Of course not. Ngayon pa ba kung kailan magkaka-baby na tayo?" My hand lowered to her flat belly. There was already a tiny life inside of her. A life that came from me. My heart swelled with something I couldn't name— a kind of hope and excitement. A glimmer of everything yet to come. It was hard to put into words. "We'd be forever connected by this life."
"We'll be bestfriends forever." She hugged me even tighter.
"Yeah... bestfriends..." I quietly said. "I still can't believe we're going to have a baby soon. Ilang tao ba ang makakapagsabi na nagkaron sila ng anak sa bestfriend nila?"
"You know ngayon lang talaga nagsisink in sa akin ang lahat. Ngayon ko naisip kung ano ang mangyayari sa magiging baby natin. How are we even going to explain our relationship to our kid?"
"We'll tell our child the truth. That we're just bestfriends who happened to accidentally create something beautiful together." I said.
"What if in the future magkaron na tayo ng sariling family natin? You're going to have a wife someday and I'm going to have a husband. We're going to have our own seperate lives. Ano na ang mangyayari?"
I swallowed when I felt my throat dry, my stomach twisting into knots. "I don't know. Pag-usapan na lang natin kapag nandyan na. Ang importante ngayon, yung baby. We have to put the baby first before ourselves."
She smiled.
"I want your blonde hair on our baby." Her hand reached up, her fingers playing with a few strands of my hair.
"Well I want the baby to have your face." I chuckled.
"I don't want the baby to have your grape face." She scrunched her nose, laughing. Bumaba ang kamay niya sa mukha ko. "Masakit pa rin ba?"
"Kind of." I answered.
"I thought he was going to kill you." She pressed light kisses on my jaw. "It really scared me. Akala ko nga patay ka na."
"Hindi pwede. Eh di walang Daddy yung baby natin."
"Kaya ba natin ito?" There was worry in her voice.
"Kakayanin natin. We created that life. There's no turning back. Always remember this, hindi ko kayo pababayaan ng baby natin."
ANAIS
Mom and I were sitting in the waiting room for the OBGYN. Dad just dropped us off the hospital. Ayaw niyang sumama sa amin. Alam kong masama pa rin ang loob niya. I'd always been a Daddy's girl and it breaks my heart everyday knowing that I'd hurt him so much to the point where he didn't want to look at me.
"I remember my first doctor's visit when I was pregnant with you." Mom smiled nostalgically and then she laughed a little. "Iyak ng iyak ang Daddy mo noong una ka niyang makita. You were barely a fetus, you were just a yolk sac. To this day, nasa kanya pa rin ang first sonogram mo."
I swallowed and felt a lump in my throat. "Will he ever forgive me, Mom?"
"Hindi ka pa tao, mahal na mahal ka na ng Daddy mo. He loves you so, so much. You and Bryce are his life. Mahal ka niya at nasaktan siya sa ginawa mo. Hindi niya lang matanggap na ang baby girl niya magkakaron na din ng baby." She tucked a few strands of my hair behind my ear.
"Mom, I don't want you or Dad to ever blame yourselves for what happened to me. Hindi kayo nagkulang sa akin. Ako yung hindi nakinig sa inyo. I'm so sorry." I wrapped my arms around her.
"Anais, my little one." Mom stroked my hair. "Mapapatawad ka din ng Daddy mo. Just give him time. Mahirap sa kanya ito. Just know that whatever you do, nandito lang kami para sa'yo. We will not let you go through this alone. He cares about you so much. He's actually the one who scheduled this checkup."
"Really?" I asked. I felt a flutter in my heart.
"Oo naman. Siya yung kumakusap sa doctor mo. He's worried about you being pregnant this young and he's worried about the baby too. Your Dad had always been like that even before. He's hard on the outside but when it comes to you and Bryce, hindi niya kayo matitiis. Just give him time." She kissed my forehead.
I nodded my head and forced a smile. "Thanks, Mom. I love you."
"I love you too, honey." She answered.
She broke away from the hug when her phone rang. She looked at the phone's screen and shook her head. "Yan na naman ang Daddy mo. Kanina pa natetense ito. I'm just going to answer his call."
I nodded my head. Lumabas siya ng room para sagutin ang tawag.
"Anais." I heard a small whisper. My head snapped on that direction. There was a guy sitting on the far left next to a woman. He had on a pair of sunglasses, a cap, and the magazine he was holding was covering his lower face. Kahit naka-disguise pa siya, alam ko kung sino yun.
"Coco?" My eyes widened.
Tumayo siya at tumabi sa akin. His face was that swollen anymore and his bruises lightened a bit.
"Ano'ng ginagawa mo dito? Baka makita ka ni Mommy." I looked around, scared that Mom would come back.
"I just want to be here for you and the baby."
"You shouldn't have come. Alam mo naman na nag-aaway na nga ang Dad natin."
"That has nothing to do with us. Gusto ko lang naman masiguradong okay ka at ang baby."
"I'll just tell you later kung ano ang sasabihin ng doctor sa akin. Please, you need to leave."
"Anais Rebecca Lavigne?" The secretary called my name.
I looked at the secretary and then I looked around. Wala pa rin si Mommy. I raised my hand nervously. "Here."
"Pasok na po kayo, ma'am." Sabi ng secretary.
My gaze turned back to Coco. I was nervous. I knew I couldn't go inside alone.
"Come on." Aya niya sa akin.
I found myself entering the room with Coco. We were greeted by a middle-aged woman, she introduced herself to us as Dr. Shirley. She asked a few questions, got my vitals, and then took me to the exam table to get my ultrasound.
She pulled up the stirrups and asked me to place my feet on it. Tumabi si Coco sa akin, he was just quietly listening to the doctor's explanations.
"Dahil nasa early stage ka pa ng pregnancy, we'd have to do a transvaginal ultrasound." Dr. Shirley explained. She held up the thing to show it to me.
"You're going to put it inside me?" I bit my bottom lip. It kind of intimidated me. The only thing that's ever been inside me was Coco's thing.
"Don't worry. Hindi naman ito masakit. Just relax." She instructed.
"O-okay..." I quietly said.
Coco started stroking my hair as the things was inserted inside me. It was cold at first but then I got used to it. She started moving it around. Tumingin kami sa screen na nasa tabi ko. It was black and white and grainy.
"There's your baby." The doctor pointed at the round white thing. I couldn't make out anything but a blob, but my skipped a bit when I saw it.
"That's our baby there... We made that..." Coco whispered in my ear.
I felt a tingly sensation in my stomach when he said those words.
"Based on the size, seven weeks na ang fetus." Sabi ng doctor.
Unexplained emotions began to overwhelmed me. Coco rested his forehead against mine. I was getting teary-eyed and I didn't even know why. Tinignan ko si Coco at nakita ang mga luha sa gilid ng mata niya.
I'd come to a full realization that a life was growing inside me now. We looked into each other's eyes. I saw a spark in them that I had never seen before.
Biglang ang dating laro lang sa amin ay naging seryoso. I looked away when it became too much for me. I just... these feelings were too foreign and it scared me.
I fixed myself after the ultrasound and he asked for the baby's sonogram. Palabas na kami ng bumukas ang pinto sa kwarto. Mom went in and she stopped when she saw me... us. I felt like my heart stopped pumping blood when I saw the man behind her. Dad lifted his gaze and I swear, his eyes turned wild like a rabid dog's when he saw Coco.
Dad came charging at him, he wrapped his fingers around his neck with one hand. "Hindi mo ba talaga titigilan ang anak ko?"
"Tito, g-gusto ko lang naman makita ang baby..." He struggled to say as he tried to pry dad's hand off his neck.
"Dad, bitawan mo siya. You're going to kill him! Please, Daddy..." I begged him.
"Axel, huwag dito. Ano ka ba?" Natataranta na din si Mommy. She held her by the arm and tried to pull him away.
"I will fucking kill you for what you did to my daughter. Paano mo nagawa sa amin ito? I treated like a family and this is how you repay me?" Humigpit ang mga daliri niya sa leeg ni Coco.
The police that Dad called came within thirty minutes. Coco didn't resist when they pulled his hands on his back and handcuffed him. I just watched. I couldn't do anything but stare at him while they drag him away. Coco looked at me straight in the eye, my eyes began to water again. His eyes softened. Tinitigan niya ako na parang sinasabi sa akin na huwag akong mag-alala.
"Do you know anything about this Val?" His voice rattled with controlled anger. Naglalakad na kami pabalik sa kotse. They were ahead of me and I was just following behind them.
"I didn't know he was there. Tayo ang magkasama, hindi ba?" She answered. "Axel, bakit kailangan mo pang gawin yun kay Coco?"
"I do not want him around Anais. Sisiguraduhin kong hindi na siya makakalapit pa sa anak ko."
"You are being pathetic. Hindi na nakakatuwa itong mga ginagawa mo. Naiintindihan ko na galit ka pero hindi na 'to tama. Let him go, Atticus." Mom said.
"Our daughter is a minor and he's clearly taking advantage of her. I've already consulted my legal counsel. I'm sorry, baby. You know I will give you the world if you ask for it but I cannot let him go."
My heart dropped to the pit of my stomach. I didn't want Coco to go to jail. He didn't deserve it.
"Dad, he didn't take advantage of me. I wanted it..." I swallowed back my sob.
"I don't want to hear you talk." He didn't even look at me.
"Dad, please let him go..." I begged.
He made a harsh spin and pointed his finger at me. His eyes blazed with hot anger and he snarled. "Not a word, Anais!"
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