Kabanata 15
Kabanata 15
"Here..." my eyes landed on Locket when he sat beside me.
I sighed, inabot ko ang bukas na bottled water na ibinigay niya sa akin at tinulungan niya akong hawakan iyon nang makitang nanginginig ang kamay ko.
When I'm done drinking, I lowered it, mabilis naman niyang inangat ang kamay para punasan ang gilid ng labi ko at napabuntonghininga lang ako.
"Thank you," I muttered after a while and smiled weakly.
"Are you okay now?" he asked and I shook my head, ibinaba ko ang tingin ko para sana titigan na lang ang kamay pero hinuli niya iyon, his other hand moved closer to my face as he tilt my chin up so he could look at me.
"What's the matter, hmm? I will listen..." he said, his soothing voice made me feel calmer.
I looked around, trying to check if he's around but Locket called my attention again.
"He isn't here," aniyang marahan kaya hinarap ko siya.
"W-wala?" I asked and he shook his head at me.
"We're far from him, hmm? He won't see us here." Aniya at napahugot na ako ng hininga.
I moved closer to him and he offered me his arm kaya mabilis akong sumiksik doon. I rested my face on his neck, my arms hugging the side of his waist, seeking for comfort and when I felt how he draped his arm around my shoulder, my tears started falling again.
I fisted his uniform and sobbed, tila hindi nauubos ang luha ko habang umiiyak doon at wala siyang reklamo habang nakasiksik ako sa kanya. I can feel how he moved his hands on my shoulder, up and down, assuring me he's here.
"I'm just here...it's okay." He whispered. "Iiyak mo lang."
I took me a while before I got a grip of myself, Locket remained patient with me, he's silently tapping my arm and kissing my hair and I was so grateful for that. Nang humiwalay ako kay Locket ay basang-basa na ang balikat niya ng luha ko at gusot na ang uniform niya, his top almost got untucked on his pants kaya suminghap na ako.
"S-sorry, Locket..." I said shyly and he glanced at me.
"Hmm?" he asked, confused pero tinuro ko ang damit niya at nang sumulyap siya roon ay natigilan pero biglang natawa.
"It's okay," he said and stared at me, "are you okay now? Nalabas mo na lahat? Gumaan ba ang pakiramdam mo?"
I nodded abruptly, he smiled and helped me dried my tears.
"Here, water again, Pinga." Aniya at muling binuksan ang tubig kaya inabot ko iyon at ininom. Habang umiinom ako ay nanatili lang siyang nakatitig sa akin kaya ngumuso ako at pinunasan ang labi ko.
"Grabe ka naman makatitig, Pingu..." I said, "para akong matutunaw."
His eyes widen, bigla akong natawa nang napakurap-kurap siya at tinuro ang sarili niya.
"I'm...I'm Pingu again?" he asked in shock kaya natawa ako at kinuha ang panyo sa kamay niya para punasan ang luha ko.
"Ayaw mo ba?"
"Gusto!" he answered in conviction. "Gustong-gusto."
I eyed me teasingly and he nodded at me, "I swear, gusto ko. Ako na ulit si Pingu, ah?" he asked kaya napangiti na ako.
"Okay...pero friends lang tayo." I said and I was expecting some violent reaction from him but I didn't, sa halip ay nagkibit-balikat lang at ngumiti.
"Alright," he answered at ako naman ang nagulat sa kanya.
"Wow, wala kang say?" I asked and the side of his lips lifted, his gray eyes twinkled when he took the handkerchief from me and he dried my cheek.
"Why would I have to say something? Are you expecting some violent reaction perhaps?" aniya kaya tumango ako ng bahagya.
"I mean...saglit lang naman kasi 'di ba naging tayo? Tapos ano...sabi ko ayaw na so I was wondering." I asked and I saw how he moved closer to me and lifted his hand, putting an ample amount of my hair and placed it behind my ear.
"You said you still weren't ready," aniya. "And I am willing to honor your decision, Crest. Kung hindi ka pa handa, ayos lang. I understand." He stared at my eyes.
My heart thumped loudly, nangilid na naman ang luha ko sa naririnig mula sa kanya.
"I know how heavy your feelings now, I felt it and I understand it. I won't force you to accept me again kung hindi ka handa, it's your decision to make and not mine. I have no right to force myself to you, Crest. I did something wrong to you, Pinga and I shouldn't force you to forgive me."
I remained staring at him while he's saying that and I felt like drowning more while staring at that sincere gray hollows he has. Hulog na ako pero ngayon ay parang mas nahuhulog lang akong lalo.
"You said you aren't stable and I understand. S'yempre ikaw muna bago ako." When I heard that, muli na namang nahulog ang luha ko, nakita kong nagulat si Locket doon at tinitigan ako.
"What? Why are you..." he asked me, akmang aabutin ang pisngi ko para punasan ang luha pero mabilis kong hinawakan ang kamay niya ng mahigpit at nagsalita.
"Bakit ka ganyan?" I asked and his forehead creased.
"Bakit ano?" he asked, still eyeing my tears. "Why are you crying..." he asked but I just squeezed his palm more.
"Bakit ganyan ka magsalita? How come you can always make my heart flutter? You always know the right words to say..." I sniffed. "Well, pwera no'ng nakaraan."
His lips protruded, natawa naman ako at napasinghot.
"Tara nga rito," he said and slowly pulled me closer. Inayos niya ang pagpunas sa luha ko at kinuha ang kamay niyang hawak ko para sapuin ang pisngi ko. "I'm sorry again. I am wrong in so many ways, Crest. I may got blinded with being worried at you but still, the words I've said are wrong."
"N-no one's perfect naman." I muttered and he nodded at me.
"I know and not all the time, people will like you kasi kahit sabihin mo na mabuti kang tao ay lalabas pa rin ang mga negatibo sa'yo. People have a mix of good and evil inside, there are always right and wrong, Crest. And I wasn't just good, masama rin ang ugali ko. I am an asshole at times who didn't even think twice before spitting harsh words, I don't talk much, but when I did hindi nakakatuwa ang lalabas sa bibig ko." I almost smiled when I thought how lovely he looked while explaining things.
"They said I have this cold aura around me and it's intimidating pero wala naman akong pakialam dati, to hell with them to look at me like that, wala naman silang alam sa akin kaya bakit ako papaapekto, right? But that wasn't good all the time, kagaya nga no'ng sabi mo, no one is perfect but that doesn't mean you wouldn't try and change your negative side, yeah?"
"Wow..." bumilog ang bibig ko. "Essay writing ba, Pingu? Ilang words?"
His shoulder fell, "Crest Veronica..." he warned kaya natawa na ako at tumango sa kanya.
"Alright, alright..." I chuckled. "I am just really happy hearing you talk that much, whenever you knock some sense to me and will say hundreds of words, natutuwa ako. Parang achievement na nakapagsalita ka ng mahaba."
"Is that...a bad thing?" he asked, confused. "Should I just stay quiet or...cold? I mean, do you prefer the cold Pingu or the talkative one?"
I bit my lip and smiled, inangat ko rin ang kamay at hinawakan ang pisngi niya.
"Anything...be cold or talktative, basta ba si Lt. Pigsa ayos lang." I smiled and I caught him staring intently at me again kaya pinisil ko na ang pisngi niya.
"Ikaw, huh? Palagi kang nakatitig sa akin, crush na crush?" I asked and his brow lifted and smirked.
"Oo." Aniya kaya nanlaki ang mata ko.
"Weh?!"
"Oo nga, Crest Veronica. Why can't you believe me? No'ng nakaraan ko pa sinasabi sa'yong gusto kita, ah?" aniya at pinisil ang pisngi ko bago bitawan kaya napakurap-kurap ako.
"It's serious..." I muttered and licked my lower lip, stopping myself to smile at pinagmamasdan niya lang ang reaksyon ko, nangingiti. "Pero hindi pa rin tayo p'wede, Pingu."
He frowned and pouted, "tss...akala ko makakalusot." He muttered kaya natawa na ako at pabirong pinalo siya.
"Let me grow first, Pingu, kapag tayo talaga ang para sa isa't-isa, tayo talaga." I smiled and he nodded, he took my palm and my heart jumped when his fingers filled the gaps in between mine and intertwined it.
"You should, ikaw muna bago tayo." He said and moved his thumb to caress the back of my palm. "I'm just here, Mama Pinga, I won't go. I will wait for you."
Marahan akong umusog para sumandal sa balikat niya, doon ko lang din napansin na maganda ang view sa aming harapan. Isa itong cliff at mula sa upuan namin ni Locket ay kitang-kita ko ang mga gusali sa ibaba.
"But...Locket?" I called and he hummed and kissed my hair.
"Hmm?"
"Is it okay if I asked you some things?" I asked and I felt him nodded and squeezed my hand more.
"Sure, go on. I will listen." Aniya at bumuntonghininga ako at pinisil din ang kamay niya.
"I am so sorry for saying this but I hope...sana sa susunod h'wag ka masyadong magpapadala sa damdamin mo bago ka magsasalita, hmm? I hope you could think first before spitting words kasi...alam kong simple lang pero nasaktan ako. No'ng..." I sighed and squeezed his hand more. "No'ng sinabi mong sakit ako sa ulo I was so hurt, Pingu. If it was another person, maybe I'd never think of it pero kasi...it's you and you're important to me kaya nasasaktan ako."
"I'm sorry..." he said and caught my chin to stare at my eyes. "You are an important person in my life too, Crest, kaya gano'n akong nag-alala but still, I admit my wrongs and I hope you could give me a chance to change and be better."
"Why not?" I smiled. "We're all problematic, dysfunctional and imperfect people and our goal is to always be better each day, right?"
He nodded and smiled at me, kissing my forehead.
"And thank you for telling me that, I do appreciate hearing those words from you."
"Because I want you to be better too...like what I'm doing for myself."
"Let's change for the better?" he asked and I smiled and nodded, resting my head on his shoulder more.
"Yeah, we should." I answered.
Silence filled us for a few moments, binusog ko ang mata sa kakatingin sa mga magagandang tanawin sa harapan ko habang nakasandal at nakahawak kay Locket.
"Pinga?" he called and I hummed. "About what happened earlier...it's still bothering me, do you want to open up?"
I shook my head and closed my eyes tightly, trying my best to imagine that horrible black eyes that monster has.
"It's...nothing, Pingu." I whispered and buried my face on his neck. "Just don't...don't let him come closer to me, okay?"
"Alright," I heard his desperate sigh. "I understand, Crest but it's bothering me that I couldn't do anything to help you. Are you hurt? Did that asshole hurt you?"
Hindi na ako nakaimik sa sinabi niya, "matagal ko ng ayaw sa gagong 'yon. He shouldn't have become a cop in the first place."
Umayos ako ng upo at nilingon siya, "what do you mean?" I asked.
I can see the coldness on his eyes, malayo ang tingin niya at nakita ko ang lalong pag-igting ng panga niya.
"He has ways on how to get away with the law." Aniya. "Connections."
I remembered what happened before and I bit my lower lip, began feeling terrified again but still calming myself down.
"He's...higher than you sa rank?" I asked and he nodded briefly and stared at our intertwined fingers, mas inangat niya iyon bago pakatitigan at halikan ng marahan.
"He's the general's son." He said, ramdam ko ang galit niya, "and I was so tired of him showing how good he is in public but manipulating everyone who's lower than him privately. He can get away with things, he can dismiss things because he has power."
Mas natakot ako sa narinig at napatitig lang kay Locket na nakatingin na pala sa akin ngayon.
"So please, Crest. If ever that man has something to do why you're panicking like that earlier, tell me. I am not forcing you to tell me things but I don't want you to keep it to yourself either. That man is dangerous and I couldn't risk you." Hindi ako nakapagsalita at inabot niya ang pisngi ko at hinaplos.
"Look at me," he said and slowly, I did. "I respect that it was your choice to keep mum about it but we're here, okay? I will do my best to help you, nand'yan ang pamilya mo para sa'yo."
"But...you said he has power and connections. Paano kung saktan kayo tapos..."
"We have too," aniya. "We have your family, Sandejas' are powerful, right? I knew it because I've known them for years tapos ako. I can help you, Crest. I will die trying."
"Don't say that!" my forehead creased and smacked his arm. "No one will die for me!"
"I am willing." Aniyang seryoso kaya kumunot ang noo ko at iritadong hinampas siya.
"You, asshole na gago!" I hissed. "No one will die for me, okay? No one!"
He sighed, inabot niya ang baywang ko at mabilis na tumungo sa balikat ko.
"Don't keep it to yourself. Let me help you, Crest." He whispered on my neck. "Please, please let me help you."
I didn't stop Locket when he offered to take me home that night, hindi na rin naman niya ako kinulit tungkol sa demonyong 'yon but I noticed his dark stares at the road while driving. Mukhang malalim ang iniisip, there are times I am having a glimpse on how his gray eyes almost turned black, humihigpit din ang hawak niya sa manibela kaya inabot ko ang hita niya at hinawakan.
"Don't think too much," I said gently and I saw how he loosened up a bit and glanced at me.
"I'm sorry," he said and I nodded and brushed my hand a bit on his leg.
"It's okay, I'm okay, Locket. I'm just...medyo nag-panic lang pero ayos na. Don't mind it, don't think of it, ayos lang ako."
He heaved a deep sigh, muling bumalik ang tingin sa daan, seryoso pa rin kaya humaba na ang nguso ko.
"Pingu..." I said and squeezed his leg, I felt him froze but didn't glance at me. "Papa Pingu!"
I saw how he gulped, ngumuso naman ako, nang-asar pa at marahang pinaraan ang kamay ko sa hita niya pababa sa tuhod at nakita ko kung paano siya bumalikwas na ng upo roon.
"Crest Veronica!" he exclaimed and glanced at me with his wide eyes kaya kumurap ako.
"Why?" I asked innocently.
"Why are you...get your hands off my leg." Aniyang mariin.
"Bakit nga?" I asked, nagmamang-maangan pa.
"Just..." he closed his eyes tightly and stared at the road. "Just get off. Don't touch it."
"Hmm..." I hummed and smiled, nakita kong tumigil kami sa stoplight. I moved my hand teasingly and chuckled when he jumped on his seat and glared at me.
"Sandejas!" he exclaimed kaya napahagalpak ako.
"What?" I asked, "hahawak lang kasi nga hindi ka kumakalma—"
"How can I calm down when you're touching me like that?" he asked kaya kumurap ako.
"Bakit ba?" I pouted, "masama ba magtouch-touch ng leg si baby Pinga?"
"It's damn okay, baby, but we're on the fucking road and I'm fucking turned on." Aniyang diretso kaya nanlaki ang mata ko at dinungaw ang pants niya na may tent nga.
"Oh? Gising ang tit—"
"Crest Veronica!" he exclaimed, parang dragon kaya suminghap ako at umatras.
"Sabi ko nga..." unti-unti akong sumandal sa upuan ko, "pero patingin—"
"Isa." He warned kaya nanlaki ang mata ko at sinandal ang ulo ko sa may salamin, ipinikit ang mata para magpanggap na tulog at baka kainin ako ng buhay ng dragon.
Kainin ng buhay... I opened my eyes.
Why not?
Everyday, we strived for the betterment. Everyday, we wish for growth and worked for it kaya gulat na gulat ang mga magulang ko when I told them I wanted to try and work for Mommy in her company. It wasn't easy, of course. Nasanay na ako sa presinto na taga-ayos ng files, tagatimpla ng kape ng mga babies ko at nakikipagharutan lang kay Locket kaya medyo nanibago ako.
My first day in Mom's company is chill, pinakilala lang ako ni Mom sa mga tauhan niya. She asked me to familiarize myself with my office at kailangan niyang umalis muna para kay Daddy kaya naiwan ako.
The people are good to me, I don't know if maybe dahil sa anak ako ng may-ari o ano pero masaya ako kasi binabati nila ako at nakikipag-usap pa sila sa akin.
From: Lt. Pingu
Hi, Pinga, we're near your office. The three ugly penguins are excited seeing you.
I chuckled, habang nasa elevator ay nag-type ako ng sagot.
To: Lt. Pingu
Okay! I haven't seen them for a week na, eh, kaya na-miss ko rin. Please tell them I am excited to see them too!
From: Lt. Pingu
How about Papa Locket? 'Di mo ako miss? 😞😞😞
I laughed at his emojis, damn, Locket. Ang hilig na makipag-text!
To: Lt. Pingu
Uh-huh? Paano kita mami-miss kung palagi kang tambay sa condo ko! Sabi ko nga FRIENDS lang tayo tapos palagi mo akong lulutuan pagkauwi mo sa duty! Pa-fall!
From: Lt. Pingu
Paki-preno naman, Crest Veronica. Ang sakit ha, bakit naka-capslock 'yong FRIENDS? 😠😠😠
I burst out laughing, hinawi ko ang kulot kong buhok at inayos ang nude colored kong bag sa siko na kakulay ng high waisted pants at coat na suot ko, sa loob ay may kulay puting v-neck at sleeveless crop top. My heels made a sound and I heard the employees greeting me na sinagot ko ng pagbati.
"Miss Crest?" the attendant from the front desk called my attention kaya bumaling ako sa kanya bago ko pa man masuot ang earpods.
"Yes?" I smiled.
"Hello po, may delivery ka po." Aniya at may inabot sa aking paper bag kaya nangunot ang noo ko.
"Kanino raw galing, Miss?" I asked and she shook her head at me.
"Wala pong sinabi, Ma'am." She answered. "Pina-deliver lang din sa kanya galing sa presinto."
"Presinto?" I asked and she nodded at me kaya nangiti ako, probably from the baby Pingu. "Thanks, Miss. Have a good day."
"Have a good day, Ma'am." Aniya kaya tumango ako at nagpaalam. I was excited while going to my car to get my things, Locket and the boys asked me if we could have a quick dinner tonight and watch some movies dahil miss na raw nila ako kaya nae-excite ako.
I went to my car and opened it pero nagtaka nang makitang bukas kaagad ang sasakyan ko. My forehead creased, I looked around and found nothing suspicious.
I probably forgot locking my car? Napaisip ako roon pero hindi ko na masyadong inalala dahil wala naman marahin magnanakaw at malamang kung mayro'n ay natangay na ang sasakyan ko.
I started the engine when I got inside to activate the aircon.
I immediately checked the paper bag, walang tag saan galing kaya kinuha ko ang laman. My eyes brightened when I saw it was a cute brown teddy bear. I remembered my other plush toy, Ping-ping and she has clothes now! Dinesign ko at tinahi noong may oras at free time kaya tuwang-tuwa si Locket nang makitang may damit 'yong bigay niyang regalo sa akin.
"Pingu is so sweet..." I muttered, "nabaril na naman niya siguro 'yong mga bibe sa perya." I chuckled and stared at the teddy bear.
I squeezed its stomach pero napansing sa halip na lambot ay parang matubig ang nasa loob ng tiyan niya kaya nangunot ang noo ko.
I stared at the bear's eyes and saw a faint red color kaya kumalabog ang puso ko.
Itinalikod ko ang laruan at nakitang may zipper sa likod. I squeezed the stomach and it felt so off and my heart thumped more, marahang binuksan ko ang likod ng laruan at napapikit nang may tumalsik na likido sa mukha ko.
I opened my eyes and my heart raced when I realized it was blood!
"Fuck!" I screamed loudly when the blood filled my hands, mabilis kong tinapon ang laruan at nanginginig na lalabas pa sana but I caught a glimpse on my backseat when I saw the rear-view mirror.
A loud and terrified scream left my lips when I saw a man wearing a black mask showed up on my backseat and pulled my arm.
"Let me go!" I screamed loudly and pushed him away. "Let me go! Let me!" but my voice faded when he was too quick to cover my mouth with his other palm.
I was struggling, terrified and shaking. Lumalaban ako pero malakas ang lalaki.
My eyes widen when I saw Locket with the boys walking towards the entrance, si Locket ay may dalang pumpon ng bulaklak at ang tatlo ay nakasunod at inaasar siya pero bubusangot lang ang huli.
"Hmmp!" I tried making a sound but ended up failing, mas humigpit ang hawak ng lalaki sa bibig at braso ko kaya mas kumawala ako.
I am hurt but I couldn't let this happen so even if I am hurting, I lifted my other hand and did my best to reach the wheels. Malakas na tumunog ang busina ng sasakyan ko nang nasa may tapat sina Locket at muli akong nahila ng lalaki kaya napadaing na ako.
"Hmp!" I kicked my feet and I saw how the boys stopped, nakita ko ang paglingon nila sa sasakyan ko at mas sumipa lang ako, ang luha'y nasa pisngi na sa takot.
My car is tinted but our eyes locked and he was too quick to dropped the flowers. Nawala ang kamay na nakahawak sa braso at nakatakip sa bibig ko at nakita kong dali-daling lumabas ng sasakyan ang lalaki sa backseat kaya sumigaw ako.
"L-Locket!" I screamed loudly and Locket quickly opened the door and pulled me out.
"Crest..." his eyes were filled with worry. "Are you okay? Are you..." I hugged him tightly, crying.
"H-help me..." I cried, "h-help..."
"Lieutenant! Tumakbo!" I heard the boys called at nakita ko ang pagdilim ng mata ni Locket nang marahan siyang lumayo sa akin.
"Earn, take care of Crest." Mariing sabi niya at nang niyakap na ako ng nag-aalalang si Earn ay nakita ko ang pagtakbo nina Locket, Brent at Adam pahabol sa lalaki sa likod ng sasakyan ko.
I was terrified. They got the man at bugbog sarado iyon kay Locket na nahuli siya and I am thankful the boys came to my aid but still... I couldn't understand why this has to happen! Wala naman akong ginagawa kaya bakit...bakit gano'n?
Hindi nila ako makausap pagkatapos ng insidente, I was shaking and crying so hard when the boy got back to me. Si Locket ay mahigpit ang yakap sa akin habang nasa biyahe kami papunta ng mansyon.
The culprit was now in police's custody but I am still scared as hell.
"I'm here...I'm here." Locket whispered and my hand is still shaking, hinuli iyon ni Locket at pinagsaklop ang kamay naming dalawa.
"L-Locket..." I called, sniffing and searched for his eyes and he moved his face closer, still hugging my body.
"Hmm? I'm here, baby. No one will hurt you, okay? I'm here." His soothing voice whispered.
My father was livid, madilim ang kanyang mukha habang kinakausap nina Locket at kinekwento ang nangyari. Tito Zeij and Zion also came here to check on me at ang mga kapatid ko ay papauwi na. My Mom is hugging me tightly, tahimik ako habang nasa bisig ni Mom at hinahalikan niya ang buhok ko.
"I-I'm so sorry, princess. I should've been there to protect you." Mom whispered, "s-sana 'di na lang ako nauna..."
My heart thumped, mas yumakap ako kay Mom at suminghap.
"I-it's not your fault, My..." I said and sighed. "It's not your fault." I whispered.
Mom took me upstairs to let me rest and avoid stress, lahat sila ay abala sa insidente. Even Locket was so engrossed commanding the police to check, communicating with my father and uncles about the culprit.
Siguro'y sa sobrang takot ay nakatulog ako at nagising sa isang masamang palaginip. As usual, it was that black-eyed monster and he's grinning me. I dreamt of him chasing me around and woke up terrified and screaming.
"H-hey...hey, princess..." mabilis akong bumaling at nagulat nang makita si Dad na nakasandal sa headboard ng kama.
"D-dad..." I called and he nodded, offering me his hand.
"Bad dream?" he asked and I nodded, still sweating from the terrifying dream I just had. "It's okay, come on, it's just a dream. You're with Dad, okay? Nothing bad will happen to you."
"D-dad..." my eyes swelled when I saw his soft blue eyes, mabilis naman niya akong inabot at inakay palapit sa kanya.
"Shh, don't cry, hmm? Dad is here." He said and lifted his hand to dry my tears. "I will protect you with my life, okay? No one could hurt you while I'm here..."
"D-daddy..." I sniffed and glanced at him. "I-I'm scared po...I'm scared." I muttered and I saw how his eyes watered.
"Hmm...I know, anak. I know." He said and cupped my cheek. "And I'm so sorry...I should've been there to protect you, princess. I should've been there."
"T-there's blood, Dad..." I told him. "I-I was used to the threats but that one...there's blood inside the bear and there's a man on my backseat..."
I saw how worried he is just by staring at his eyes, my father is always strict and composed but his eyes now...it's way more different than before.
"It's okay, tell me everything, hmm? I'm here, I will listen." My heart almost dropped when I saw tears slowly forming on his eyes.
"N-natatakot po ako, Dad..." I confessed. "T-takot na takot po ako..." I said and the moment I saw his tears fell, I lost it.
I started sobbing and Dad tried to stay tough at first but lost it when I crawled more and hugged his waist.
"I-I'm so scared, Dad. I'm so scared." I whispered and hugged him tightly.
Not a moment later, I felt his tight and warm hug. I felt like a little kid clinging on my father's arm while sobbing and he's just there, comforting me, hugging me tightly as if I'll fade if he ever loosened his grip.
I can hear his cries while I'm leaning on his chest and it broke my heart more.
"S-sorry, sorry..." he whispered. "D-dapat nando'n ako para tulungan ka...dapat nando'n..."
"I-it's not your fault," I said and hugged him more. "It's not your fault, Dad."
"P-palagi na lang kitang napapabayaan," he muttered. "S-sorry, anak...please forgive Dad."
It hurts hearing my Dad's soft cries, he was a tough man so seeing him in this state is making me weak.
"S-sorry if I am unconsciously hurting you, s-sorry if hindi kita nabibigyan ng pansin. S-sorry if I keep on failing you, anak..." when his voice broke, I moved away, nang tignan ko si Dad ay nakita kong nahuhulog ang luha sa mga mata niya.
"A-ako dapat nagpoprotekta sa'yo pero hindi...ako pa 'tong...ako pa 'yong..." he lowered his head and I bit my lip and covered my mouth.
"D-dad..."
"Dapat pinoprotektahan kita, eh! Dapat ligtas ka palagi kaso..." he harshly removed the tears on his cheek. "T-tang ina...w-wala akong kwentang Tatay, ni hindi ko mapagtanggol ang anak ko."
"D-don't say that!" I said and shook my head, inabot ko ang kamay ni Daddy at pinisil.
"I should've been your number one protector p-pero ako itong wala kapag kailangan mo ako..."
My lips quivered while staring at my vulnerable father.
"D-dad..." I searched for his eyes and saw that it was bloodshot and in pain. "It's not true, hmm? Y-you're the best father."
"N-no, I'm not..." he shook his head, lowering his head. "I-I keep on failing my children—"
"Dad..." I caught his hand and shook my head. "Don't say that." I said weakly pero mas nanubig lang ang mata ni Dad sa luha at ang braso ay tinakip na sa mata.
I heard his sobs and my heart ache, mabilis akong lumuhod, inabot ang batok ni Dad at mabilis siyang niyakap.
"S-sorry..." he sobbed loudly while burying his face on my shoulder and I closed my eyes tightly, my body's shaking.
"D-don't cry..." I whispered and sniffed. "P-please, Dad, please don't cry. M-masakit po 'yong heart ko. Dad...please."
But his sobs filled my ear more, mas yumakap siya sa akin, takot na takot.
"I-I'm sorry, Crest. P-patawarin mo ang Daddy, s-sorry...mahal na mahal kita, anak." He whispered and touched my nape and kissed my head. "Mahal na mahal kita."
"D-dad..." I cried like a child on his arms and he embraced me like his life depended on it.
"S-sorry, prinsesa ko. M-mahal na mahal kita, mahal na mahal ko kayong magkakapatid. Pantay-pantay kayo sa puso ko. K-kung wala kayo...wala kami ng Mommy mo." He whispered and I closed my eyes tightly and hugged him tighter.
"P-pasali naman sa yakapan..." we heard a voice kaya napahiwalay ako kay Dad at umawang ang labi nang makita sina Mom, Chiel at Adira na naroon.
"M-mom..." I muttered and I saw her watering eyes, nang sumulyap ako kay Adira na aming bagong abogado ay nakitang nagpupunas siya ng luha.
Si Chiel ay nakanganga sa amin at napasulyap kay Dad na sumisinghot pa.
"Did Dad just cried—"
"Shut up." Dad said and Chiel grinned.
"Oh, napaiyak ni Thallia-liit si Dad!" halakhak niya pero napailing na lang ako.
"Group hug!" ani Adira at nangilid ang nahulog na naman ang luha ko nang maramdaman ang mahigpit na yakap ni Mom at Dad, si Adira ay sumisinghot na habang nakayakap at si Chiel ay kumukurap lang habang nakayakap sa amin.
"I love you all..." I heard Dad muttered.
"Mahal na mahal namin kayong lahat mga anak, ah?" Mom's voice broke. "K-kayo ang buhay namin ng Daddy niyo..."
When I heard that, I found myself crying again while hugging my loving family.
"Bakit kayo umiiyak?" ani Chiel. "Wala namang nakakaiyak, ah?" aniya pero pumiyok, nahuli kong nahulog ang luha sa pisngi niya kaya inilingan ko na.
"Pangit mo, Alchiel..." I said and pulled him closer so we could hug him more. We heard him curse when we cage him into the center at pinunasan ko ang basang pisngi kong may luha at pinunas sa mukha niya.
"Ayan, sipon." I teased and when he screamed, nauwi na kami sa tawanan.
It was a fun night and I never felt a lot warmer than before. We had our dinner as a family, noong gabi rin ay nasa theater room kami sa mansyon para manuod ng horror movie para sa bonding naming pamilya.
Of course, it was me who chose the movie for us kaya parang lalabas na ang ngala-ngala ng kambal ko at ni Dad sa suspense ng movie, Adira was covering her eyes at kaming dalawa ni Mommy ay halos mamatay lang sa kakatawa sa kanilang tatlo.
I stayed for another day inside the mansion and I felt happy when I found out my family cancelled their work the same day so we could bond. We had our swimming race, salo-salo sa lunch with Mom and mine's precious and great cooking skills kaya ang ending ay nag-tae sila.
Weirdly, hindi ako ginulo ni Locket sa text and when I texted him ay sumagot naman.
From: Lt. Pingu
I'm glad you had fun with your family, Pinga. You should sleep and rest now, baby. I'll see you tomorrow. Here's a penguin kiss🐧😗
PS: Kiss baby Ping-ping for Papa Locket, okay?
The next day, lunch time. I was informed that a personal guard for my safety came and guess what? It's none other than Lorcan Keith.
"Are you freaking serious?!" I exclaimed and he smirked and winked at me.
"At your service, Mama Pinga." He even saluted kaya umawang lang ang labi ko.
Locket was a good boy, well, he was a quiet man. Mukhang misteryoso, masungit. He's sporting a clean cut hair, I even noticed a familiar locket on his neck, that one I gifted him. Those thin red lips and oh, that seducing gray eyes is such an eye candy. Plus, that gray shirt and camouflage pants kaya hindi na ako nagulat na pinag-uusapan kaagad siya.
But Pingu...he's mine.
When dinner came, sumakay ako kay Locket.
No, that sounded wrong. I mean, I rode the car with Locket as my driver because first and foremost, I was so scared of driving alone because of what happened.
We went to a mall to have dinner and of course, all eyes on Locket, as usual. He looks so good on his civilian clothes at dahil nasanay nga ako sa kanyang suot madalas na uniporme ay halos maglaway na ako kapag nakashirt lang siya at pants.
"Where to, Pinga?" Locket asked when we got inside the mall looking for some restaurants to eat.
"Hmm, I know a Spanish resto here, Pingu." I smiled and put my arms on his waist. I heard him chuckled a bit and my heart thumped when he placed his arms around my shoulders.
"Uh-huh, bakit may paakbay?" I asked and he smirked and kissed the side of my head.
"Akbayang magkaibigan lang, Pinga." Aniya at pinisil ang pisngi ko kaya natawa na ako.
We were walking and I kept on measuring our height difference, nakaheels na ako lahat-lahat pero hindi ko pa rin mapantayan si Lorcan Keith kaya napapanguso na ako.
"Locket—"
"Oh, fancy seeing you two here!" nawala na kaagad ang ngiti ko nang makarinig ng pamilyar na boses.
I shifted my gaze and my heart thumped nervously when I saw Eugene's familiar and terrifying black eyes. Nababa ko ang kamay mula sa baywang ni Locket.
"Lt. Col." I heard Locket greeted coldly, his arms on my shoulder lowered down at nang maramdaman ko ang braso niya sa baywang ko ay marahang hinapit niya ako sa kanyang katawan.
"Woah, I didn't expect to see you here, hmm?" He smirked, from Locket, his scary eyes shifted to mine and I was in the verge of hyperventilating but I controlled myself.
I gripped Locket's shirt, naramdaman ko ang mas mahigpit na hawak ni Locket sa baywang ko, tila pumoprotekta kaya mas lumakas ang loob ko.
Sinalubong ko ang mata ni Eugene at tinaas ang kilay niya, I caught the smirk he has when he saw me looking.
"What's with the silence?" I heard Eugene smiled and glanced at Locket na mariin at madilim ang tingin sa kanya. "Hindi man lang ako nakapagkilalang maayos sa kasama mo, Lt." He glanced at me.
"Crest, right? I am Eugene—"
"Don't fucking touch her." Mariing sabi ni Locket kaya naiwan sa ere ang kamay ni Eugene.
"Oh, why?" he smirked. "Is she scared or something?" his eyes soften as he glanced at me. "Don't worry, Miss, I am a good man, I am a police officer—"
"I don't like to disrespect but fuck you to hell." I said and he was stunned upon hearing that.
Locket remained looking at him darkly, si Eugene naman ay umangat ang labi sa amusement at bago pa makapagsalita ay nagsalita na ako.
"Excuse me." I said and pull Locket away, iniiwas siya sa galit niya. I saw how he fisted his palm, mukhang gustong suntukin ang mukha ni Eugene pero hinawakan ang kamao niya at hinaplos.
"Come on, baby." I said. "Let's go home." Marahang sabi ko at nakita ko ang paglambot ng mata ni Locket at unti-unting kumalma.
Hindi na kami nakakain ni Locket sa mall at walang salitang nagtungo lang sa sasakyan niya. He silently drove me home but I can see how mad he is, kagaya noong nakaraan ay mariin ang pagkakakuyom ng kanyang kamao sa manibela, matiim pa ang tingin.
When we got into my condo, ay pakiramdam ko'y nanghihina ako at naiiyak at ayaw kong makita niya iyon kaya dumiretso ako sa shower sa kwarto ko para maligo.
I opened the shower, drenched my body into the cold water and when I began scrubbing my body hardly, tears began falling. I am controlling my sobs but every touch of the rough scrub is triggering memories, making me cry.
Masakit na ang balat ko at namumula pero wala akong pakialam. I scrubbed my body harder and harder until I was tired.
Nanghihina pa ako at walang-gana habang binabalot ang katawan ng robe at pagkalabas ay nakita ko si Locket na nakaupo sa gilid ng kama ko, nakatingin sa pader at tahimik.
The monster's terrifying black eyes flashed on my mind, I can remember his dark smirk and the way he...bumilis ang paghinga ko.
Locket shifted his gaze and when our eyes locked, I made a decision.
"Hey, baby..." he called and stood. "I ordered foods for us—" but he was stunned and shocked when I pushed him back on the bed and straddled his legs.
He blinked, mabilis siyang humawak sa baywang ko at hinanap ang mata ko, napapalunok pa.
"Crest, why are you..." I moved my head closer to him and claimed his lips, stopping him. He wasn't kissing me back so I put my arms on his shoulder and opened my mouth to tease him and a moment later, he's kissing me back.
I closed my eyes tightly, letting Locket kiss me, telling myself it's my Lorcan who's kissing me but then he softly moved away and stared at me.
"Crest..." he called and my heart fell, my mouth still parted.
"S-sorry...ayaw mo ba?" I asked, my eyes are in the verge of tears while waiting for his reaction but he's just staring at me, as if observing me kaya bigla na akong nahiya. "S-sorry...I was aggressive, I should—" akmang tatayo na ako pero mabilis niya akong nahila pabalik sa kandungan niya kaya natigilan na ako.
"Hey," he soft gray eyes met mine, ang isang kamay niya ay pinirmi niya sa baywang ko at ang isang palad ay dinala niya sa pisngi ko. "What's the matter?"
I shook my head and lowered my gaze, "s-sorry, I was wrong for kissing you like that—"
"No, it's okay." Aniya at inangat ang baba ko. "I'd like to kiss you too, baby but tell me what's wrong, hmm? I can't have the pleasure of kissing you knowing something's bothering you."
My heart thumped, I was so scared of my memories but it's Locket so it's okay.
"I just want to..." I bit my lower lip. "I just want to make love to you, Lorcan."
He was stunned, miski ako ay nagulat sa sinabi ko pero pinanindigan ko na.
"I-I want you." I muttered and I saw his eyes darkened. "I want to feel you, Locket. Please."
He stared at my eyes and he equaled the passion my eyes are giving him and not a moment later, we were kissing each other's lips fervently. I felt his hands on my skin, wala pang ilang segundo ay nasa kama na ako at nasa ibabaw ko na siya.
"Are you sure?" he asked and removed the wet strands of my hair and I nodded and pulled his nape.
"Yes," I said and kissed him fully.
He groaned when it was me who initiate our kisses, I can feel him calming himself down and getting a grip but when my hand went beneath his shirt, he lost it. He moved away, pulled his shirt from the back, exposing his well-built abdomen and arms.
He untangled my robe and I saw how his eyes wandered on my twin peaks. Nang muling bumaling siya sa mga mata ko ay nakita kong itim iyon kaya bigla akong nanigas. I felt him lowered his head to kiss me again pero nang mapansing hindi na ako gumagalaw ay muling umangat.
"Hey..." he called gently and I opened my eyes and saw his gray ones.
Oh my God...oh my God, it's Locket. It's his gray eyes. He's Locket!
"I-is it you?" I asked and his forehead creased more, inabot niya ang pisngi ko at hinaplos. "L-Locket is that...is that you?"
I can see how confused he is but he nodded, "yes, it's me, it's Locket." And when he said that, my tears started falling.
"L-Locket..." I hummed and sobbed. "L-Locket ko...ikaw 'yan?"
"It's me...baby, it's me." Aniya at nakita ko ang mabilis niyang pag-upo, at marahang pag-angat sa akin. My robe fell, I didn't know I was shaking kung hindi niya lang ako hinawakan at mabilis na pinaupo sa kanyang hita, mabilis na niyayakap.
"L-Locket..." I called and he touched my back and hugged me.
"It's okay, Crest. It's me, Pingu..." he whispered and my eyes swelled more, nilingon ko siya at nakitang seryoso at puno ng pag-aalala nang makita ang mga mata niya. "Sorry...sorry, I shouldn't have done that." He even apologized pero mabilis na akong umiling, walang pakialam kung litaw na ang katawan at mabilis siyang niyakap.
He hugged me back without hesitation and I buried my face on his neck while I was seated on his lap and whispered.
"S-sorry, Locket...sorry, I'm just..." my voice broke.
"It's okay, it's okay..." he hummed and kissed my hair.
He calmed me down for a while and when I did, he remained cuddling me on his lap, humahalik sa pisngi ko at mahigpit na hawak ang kamay ko.
"It's okay, it's me. I won't hurt you." He whispered in assurance and I closed my eyes and nodded.
Napasulyap ako sa may uluhan ng kama at nakitang naroon si Ping-ping, nakasuot ng kinostumized kong damit na pink na crop top at skirt at may ribbon pang headband kaya suminghot pa ako.
"L-Locket...Locket si Ping-ping." I said softly and Locket froze, nakita kong mabilis siyang napamura nang makita si Ping-ping at inabot iyon bago itinalikod.
"Bad, Ping-ping." He said, "bawal mo makitang hubad si Mama Pinga." Aniya kaya bigla na akong natawa at nilingon siya.
He was pouting but I saw the hidden smile on his lips kaya ngumuso na ako.
"Sorry again..." I muttered and he smiled and nodded, mabilis niyang inabot ang shirt niya sa gilid ng kama at pinasuot sa akin at nang matapos ay muli akong yumakap sa kanyang leeg.
"Sorry, Locket. I shouldn't have done that." I whispered. "A-and..." may naalala ako kaya sumikip ang dibdib ko at mas sumiksik. "And...and I'm not..."
"What?" he asked and touched my back. "You're not?"
Mariing ipinikit ko ang mata habang iniisip kung anong iisipin niya.
"I-I want to give you myself so bad, Locket." I said and closed my eyes tightly, kinukuyom ang kamay. "But I'm..."
"It's okay, tell me, hmm?" he hummed and I sighed and spoke.
"I'm not a virgin, Locket." I whispered painfully. "H-hindi ko mabibigay sa'yo kung...kung wala na."
I was expecting him to be disappointed or to have a violent reaction like how others would react and I am so scared, lalo na no'ng humawak siya sa balikat ko at inilayo na ako.
When I met his gray eyes, I was so shy and embarrassed, afraid of how he'll react.
"Hey..." he said and touched my cheek kaya unti-unti akong nag-angat ng tingin. "Does it matter?"
"L-Locket?" I called. "I-I will understand kung ayaw mo na sa'kin, I-I am not w-what you might have expected and I'm sorry for—"
"Virginity is just a term made by people, baby." He said while staring at me. "That won't make you less of a woman, that won't make you less worthy."
Natigalgal ako nang pinatakan niya ako ng halik sa labi bago ngumiti at nagsalita.
"That piece of tissue would never define anyone's worth. Virgin or not...you're a woman, you're my Crest Veronica and you are always worth it." Aniya at doon na ako napahagulgol.
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