twenty [end]
Jaemin eyes Mark as he slammed the door of their dorm room open, throwing his backpack on the ground and slumping down his bed.
"What is up your ass?", the guy asks but then stops himself, "Nah, nevermind, I'm guessing it's Donghyuck, ain't it"
"Tomorrow is the day he gets surgery to remove my mark and he has been running away from me the whole week"
"You don't have to be there, you know. Injun said Donghyuck's heat is coming soon so it's better for you to not trigger his sense, it'll be harder for him to heal later", the guy said, nonchalantly but then stops in his track and eyed his roommate. "Hold on why do you care anyway?"
"Why do I ca-", Mark stops himself, "Are you interrogating me?", he snaps, looking at his roommate, "He is my temporary mate, everything he has going on, has to go through me"
"Does it though hyung?", Jaemin questions, "The last time I checked, you said you're only doing it because it's your alpha responsibility"
"He didn't want your mating bite to begin with", Jaemin said, opening his laptop, "Point blank, Mark. No matter how attentive and caring you are, it doesn't change the fact that you guys' bond only exists because of a one night stand. It's wearing Donghyuck off"
"You don't know that. There are many things in our relationship that you guys have no knowledge of. Mark furrowed his eyebrows, "We have our ups and downs but we have got over all of it and make out the other side..."
"I've always valued his feelings and opinions, why can't he do the same? I'm still very much his mate"
"While he isn't yours, hyung", the other said, "There isn't a bite mark on your body. You're not as much of his mate as he is to you"
His Alpha feels physically unwell when he hears that. What does Jaemin know anyway? He is Donghyuck's alpha. He takes care of his heat, he fetches the younger everyday and in return, the omega would... Donghyuck, as his omega, he would... Mark tries to think after they mended their past, they did get better at being a cooperative couple. Didn't they? Is it just him who tried immensely?
Mark swallows as if air has been knocked out of him.
Haechan never actively fill his duals as an omega because he doesn't consider him Mark's and that possibility scares him.
"Let it go, hyung. He isn't your business anymore:
"He still is. Fuck you!", Mark freaks out, his inner peace is starting to crack , "He is! The moment he finished that stupid surgery, he may not but right now, he is still my goddamn omega. I don't care whatever bullshit you pull on me"
"Hyung....", Jaemin is so taken back.
"I gotta go", Mark grabs his jacket, "I'm going there"
"I don't think it's a good id-"
"Don't fucking tell me what to do!", Mark growls, "I'm going to break you Jaem"
"F...fine"
"Thank you"
Mark is in a fit of rage. Reasonably so in his mind, justified even. He puts his heart on the line and has been nothing but forgiving and sincere, he bears himself for Donghyuck, then and now. The younger took it for granted and decides everything on his own, even o this "special day", he is going to remove his bond without even acknowledging him?
------
Donghyuck look way too comfortable for a day like this, Mark observes as he loos the omega fumbling with his rice krispies pack. There is a tiny smile evident on his face, lying in his patient clothes and it absolutely throws Mark off.
Why isn't he as bothered as him> Donghyuck was the one with a bond... his mark on his neck, why can he be so calm and collected?
Mark's blood boils in alpha anger but his decency stops him in his track before making a scene that he might regret.
He decided to knock on the door and invites himself in right away. Their eyes mêt and the air turns awkward as his scent mixes with Donghyck's.
"You're here alone?", "Taeil hyung is out for a bit to prepare my dinner after I..."
" Finished your surgery to removed my mark, without me", Mark can't help but sounds bitter, "How pleasant, this is how you treat me"
The younger hides away from Mark's gaze, hands bunching up his blanket, "I don't...want to bother you, alright? I asked you to mark me and it did become this whole thing and you have done your part as an alpha, swallowing your pride to make things even with me or whatever, This is the least I could do, be a big boy for once and remove the bond, giving your... freedom back"
Mark's eyebrows are knitted, hands folded and he scoffed.
"Who do you think you are to even think what's freedom for me. I have never... ever thought about our situation like that. Did you trap me? When? What the hell is this 'freedom' that you're on about. Yeah, I did swallow my pride to mend things that are fucked up between us, not because I'm an alpha. And I didn't bend over and service you because that's an alpha duty either. I did it because I want to", he snapped, "I wanted to make things right with you. It was never because of our deal as each other's partner.
Partner. That word sure stirs up a certain emotion from Donghyuck.
"Don't be ridiculous", the boy stammered, "If we were to be partners, it would not be only me carrying this bond. This is a mishap, you don't actually want me, your judgement is clouded by the bond, just let me get this over with and then...then you can be with whoever you actually wanted to be with"
"Stop that!", Mark growls, walking over the omega's bed, "Stop doing the thinking for me. I'm rated A in Alpha Qualification Test, I do know how to separate what's pheromone thinking and what's mine. All I want is that you also care about my feelings when you decide to do things that affect both of us"
"I do this for both of us!", the younger restrains, "I've heard it directly from you 'Hey, six months of suffering is coming to an end, aye' I don't want you to suffer. The longer I stick around, the more tiring you will feel. That's your subconsciousness"
Mark sigs, finally give in and puts down his mask. Donghyuck's constant denial makes him nauseous in the brain and totally defeated in his alpha's mind. Everything he've done, he thought they were clear of intentions. Giving his all to Donghyuck, he thought he proved a point. But it's such a pity, his message is lost in translation.
"But the shorter you stick around, the more miserable my heart is", he sighs, looking at the omega. "Don't you understand Hyuck? I've always loved you"
And time stopped. At least for the younger male. Suddenly his heart pull strings. He didn't expect this. What's supposed to happen now is Mark blowing up at him and everything falls apart, he gets the surgery and be oh so sad by himself. Not this. Not Mark telling him that he has been in love with him since whenever.
"I loved you platonically when we were friends with benefits.
I loved you through your hatred and anger towards me because I'm a coward and the whole summer after that", Mark confessed, searching for Donghyuck's hand under the covers.
"I loved you the moment I see you on the school campus and I loved you through our weird phases of pinning and tensions.
I loved you the night we had sex and I loved you when the consequences poured down on us.
But most importantly, I love you now and my heart can't stop beating for you anytime soon"
The alpha continues to ramble, "So please, continue to trap me and make me suffer in your love. I would love nothing more than to also carry your mark, be your alpha forever and held down by you"
"What about you Donghyuck?"
"Do you love me?"
Donghyuck's head drops, "You never told me hyung", "Was it ever a right time"
"Never, yeah", the omega agreed, "You're dumping a lot on me"
"I planned something else but since I got notified that you're here to.... this has to suffice"
Things are not making sense for Donghyuck, "You planned to confess?"
"It's inevitable"
"This is a lot for me Mark", "I understand. You can take your time, just don't.... maybe postpone the surgery?"
"I...", Donghyuck looks at the alpha's hand on him. So familiar, so warm.
"Please, just please reconsider it if just for a moment, your love reciprocates mine"
Donghyuck can barely listen to Mark. His brain is working overtime ever since he heard Mark's heart to heart. It's unreal.
Unreal!
All this time, all these opportunities, he only says it now? Minutes before his surgery?
"You never told me..."
"I have always showed. Aren't actions louder than words?", Mark said under his word. "I got better", he said under his breath.
"I can protect you this time"
And the omega scoffed at that.
"From who? I'm so comfortable in my own skin. I'm proud that I'm gay, I'm proud of my relationships. The only things I'm terrified of are the things that come in a package with you"
"I'm trying to fix it for us"
"I don't need to be fixed. You do. You toyed me and dumped me for your selfish pride and now you want me to just put it alllll aside and love you unconditionally without a shout of doubt in mind', Donghyuck's voice shakes, "I loved you Mark, but it went nowhere but hell"
"What about me? You outed me and then I dipped, I was deeply hurt, so bad, but I found it in myself to forgive you for ruining my life because in the end, I, too, am proudly myself for you", Mark begs, his eyes are stinging. "Don't you love me now? Can you feel it in the last months Hyuck?"
"I do. I do. Okay?", the omega raised his voice before deflating like a poked balloon," But I'm not a saint like you. I don't believe my omega self's judgement and I can't.... with you now"
And with that, Mark deflated too. The younger's hand is so warm, contrasting to him. Just like puzzles that fir, like two halves that complete. Everything is in their favour yet they still can't work it out.
"Patient Lee, I'm here to deliver you to the operation room. Are you ready?"
Mark squeezed Donghyuck's hand, grasping the last straws, "Donghyuck, baby, please... Do you not want me?"
The younger looks at him, beautifully unforgiving as always. He leans in before cradling Mark's face in between his hands and in a moment, he feels the younger male's lips against his.
Sweeet. Honey. The scent that drives him to insanity.
The alpha grumbles, a tear rolls down his face as he presses his whole into the kiss, tobacco mix lingers and mixes itself with Donghyuck's calming pheromones.
"I'll never stop loving you, my omega:
The younger smiles bitterly at him
Don't say it, please no.
"Not now alpha. Maybe later, I hope"
As Donghyuck got rolled away into the operation room, the tobacco mix sours, stench.
In the end, he is always unwanted.
- the end –
Hi, hello, first of all, I want to sincerely thank you, the ones that have reached the end of this story. I'm so sorry for taking so long but ever since I entered Highschool, it's been a spiral of work and competitions that winded me away from writing. My love for Mark and Donghyuck stays and blooms though, no worries. I hope that we can continue this journey together and travel through more Mahae aus together. I hope you all have a great day, stay healthy and see you at my next work.
Love, viesie
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