5
Yoongi and Taehyung have grown closer since the younger has revealed his inner demons. At first, he had been afraid Yoongi will look at him differently and this fear came true – kind of at least. Yoongi does look at him differently but not in a bad way and to be honest, Taehyung likes the new attention on him and it feels like Yoongi lets himself open up to the younger too. Like he finally allows himself to really be friends with him and Taehyung couldn't be happier.
Well, right now he could.
It's not like he's never seen Yoongi's friends before. He knows Namjoon and he knows Seokjin. He also knows a guy Yoongi often calls on the phone by the name of Hobi but that doesn't mean he can't be a little nervous (scared) when meeting the rest of the elder's friends. It's a twice in a month occurrence. Yoongi leaves Friday evening and comes home very late from his friend's place. This time, he makes Taehyung tag along. "It's about time you meet new people and get friends too," he had said.
"I have you," Taehyung had argued, "And I know Seokjin and Namjoon. I don't need anymore."
But in the end, Yoongi had won and this is how Taehyung finds himself one Friday evening in a dark alleyway. They're still in downtown this time, not where Seokjin or Namjoon live so the get together must be at the place of one of the others. It's not like Taehyung is bad with new people, he's great with customers but he isn't really trying to be friends with those and spends at max a few minutes with them. Meeting Yoongi's other friends is something else and the scary dark alley isn't really helping his nerves.
"Sure is dark in here," he says, eyes jumping from left to right. This can't be an alleyway meant to be passed through. It's dirty, dark and doesn't smell so good. People get stabbed in alleys like this one. In every single movie or TV show, he's seen people never leave these kinds of places unharmed and he really doesn't want to know if he would be able to not piss himself when confronted with a man and a knife threatening him.
"I'm not scared or anything," He quickly adds but the slight jump at a noise proves something else. "I mean, who's scared of the dark these days? Not me." He steps a little closer to Yoongi and almost shrieks as a cat suddenly emerges from the shadows. His hands have found Yoongi's arm on their own and now he's almost hanging off the other, clinging to him in fear. This is bad. What kind of friends does Yoongi have if they live somewhere in this alley? Probably people who rob other's here.
"Do you want me to hold your hand?" Yoongi asks and Taehung could hear the amused undertone in his voice. He vehemently shakes his head because of two very important reasons. Number one is that he really doesn't want to seem like such a weakling who's scared of the dark and of meeting other people. Even when in reality, he actually is scared of these things but Yoongi doesn't need to know that, does he?
The second very important reason is how much Taehyung actually wants to hold his hand. Not because he's scared but because it would be holding hands with Yoongi. It surprises him day after day how much he's started to want to touch the other, hold him, hug him and yeah, hold his hand. But the mere thought of any of these things actually happening makes his heart pick up speed, his stomach flutter, breath stutter and brain dissolve into a sticky mess. For the sake of his own health, he couldn't hold the other's hand –
Something clutters behind them and on reflex, Taehyung grabs Yoongi's hand tightly. "Yes, please," He almost whimpers and starts walking impossibly close to the other. He could feel his warmth through the jackets and his skin tingles where Yoongi strokes it with his thumb. If he's going to die tonight in this alley it would at least be while doing something he really enjoys. Holding hands with Yoongi.
Despite still being scared he feels a little safer now. But maybe that's only because there's a sudden warmth pooling in his chest and things that suspiciously feel like butterflies run wild in his stomach. This is bad. But it feels too good and he couldn't help but gaze down at their intertwined fingers and how perfectly they seemed to fit together.
He's so busy with staring at their hands that he doesn't notice when they stop in front of a stone staircase, not until Yoongi slightly nudges him with an amused grin on his face. Like he just caught Taehyung doing something he shouldn't have seen. And to be honest, he kind of did. "We're here, you can let me go now," He laughs and Taehyung's gaze drops to their hands for the fraction of a second.
A sudden rush of confidence runs through him and he raises his gaze again with a challenging smirk on his own lips. "What if I don't want to?"
"Ha ha," Yoongi laughs dryly and pulls Taehyung up the stairs – He doesn't let go of his hand. "Let go now, they're probably waiting for us already." Inside, they climb up the staircase and stop in front of a door with peeling green color. Yoongi turns to talk to him before he knocks, his face looks serious again. "Listen, before we go in there – I know you're a good person but I know you can be awkward too. These are nice people, please try to be on your best behavior because this is the only thing I do besides work and looking after the kids."
"Yoongi, I know how to behave myself. I'm good at making new friends – well, meeting new people and pretending to be friends right off the bat," Taehyung chuckles awkwardly. A few weeks ago he might have taken this comment from Yoongi as offending but not anymore. He knows it's the elder's special way of expressing concern for someone else. Yoongi often has problems articulating exactly what he wants to convey but Taehyung has quickly learned to differentiate between Yoongi's clumsy way of expressing himself and a comment he makes to be not so nice.
"I know that but these people – the people inside of this apartment are my extended family. Here is no pretending and I'm sure they'll be delighted to meet you so... uhm, I just hope you'll be able to do this." He scratches behind his right ear again. So, he's nervous too. Well, of course, he is. He's probably afraid his friends won't like Taehyung but he hopes that won't happen. Taehyung will do anything to become friends with those people if it'll make Yoongi smile and if they're friends of the elder they must be very nice. Just like Seokjin and Namjoon are – so this might as well be a win-win situation for everyone.
"It's gonna be okay, you can have your time off and I'll mingle with your friends too," Taehyung smiles – his nerves have settled a bit but not to the extent that he's calm again. "Don't worry." The words leave his lips just as the door in front of them flies open and two guys try to fit through the frame at the same time.
One of them is slightly smaller and the first one to speak to him. "You must be Taehyung!" He says, smiling wide and his eyes form crescents on his cute face, "My name is Park Jimin – "
"You can call him shorty," the other guy interrupts Jimin as he shoves him to the side, making him stumble as he leans in the doorway. Black hair swept over his forehead and teeth almost bunny like as he smiles at them.
"Yah!" Jimin shoves him back, the light brown strands of his hair falling into his eyes as he glares at the other boy, "I'm not afraid to hit you!"
"It's so cute when you try to threaten me but can't even reach my face," the other boy coos, bending down so that he and Jimin are on the same eye level. Taehyung couldn't help the smile on his lips. They seem like fun people.
"Listen here you little shit – "
"Okay, guys, calm down?" A third person enters Taehyung's vision. This one has a smile as bright and blinding as the sun. "I'm Hoseok," He says before nodding towards the tall black haired guy, "And this disrespectful brat is Jeongguk."
"Nice to meet you, I'm Taehyung." He smiles at them, feeling a little more confident because of the three smiles he gets in return. Why was he even worried? The three of them look extremely nice –
"We know," Jimin says and his smile transforms into something more like a smirk as he quickly glances at Yoongi. Taehyung is a little confused by the silent exchange between them but the other two males seem to know exactly what's going on because they're stifling their laughs. "Yoongi can't stop talking about you – "
"I crave a drink!" Yoongi interrupts his talking and quickly pulls Taehyung with him, "Let's go inside."
The hallway is narrow and stocked with shoes of different sizes and jackets in various colors. Yoongi lets his own jacket fall on top of a huge black one while simultaneously toeing off his shoes and kicking them on the heap with the others. Taehyung stalls once he's inside the apartment. Is it rude if he leaves his things just like everyone else on the floor?
He stands there, a little lost until the smaller male – Jimin, he reminds himself, Jimin – urges him to drop his things and join the rest in the living room. The other two males – Jeongguk, Jeongguk the dark haired one and Hoseok, Hoseok the energetic one – push past him quickly in order of fighting for the last spot on the couch.
"Hey Jin, Namjoon," Taehyung timidly waves at the two who are already on the couch. Seokjin complaining loudly over Hoseok's knee in his stomach while Jimin tries to balance himself.
He stays put in the doorway, smiling shyly at the greeting of the two on the couch and accepting the glass of water Yoongi offers him as he comes back from the kitchen. The living room has a cozy atmosphere, it's similar to Yoongi's place – it looks like people really live here. Textbooks strewn on tables, CD cases, and video game cases on the table and a lot of pictures on the walls. Posters of bands, polaroids on which Taehyung recognizes the other six. But there are also a lot of photographs which look almost professionally made – landscapes, sunsets, buildings, the sky and an awful lot of what looks like Jimin.
There's the particular one which catches Taeyhung's eye. A rooftop, the sun shining brightly in the background but the focus of the picture is on the male jumping gracefully in the air. It's Jimin – at least Taehyung thinks it is. It looks like a jump straight out of a classic ballet and Taehyung can't seem to keep his eyes away.
"Beautiful, right?"
Taehyung flinches as the voice speaks up next to him.
"Jeongguk is a talented photographer," Yoongi says with a small smile playing on his lips.
Taehyung hums in response, heart calming down again because Yoongi has stepped out of his personal bubble again. It's so weird. He feels so weird whenever the elder is too close and it's especially hard at night. He knows Yoongi is awake but he himself pretends to be asleep just to not have to explain why he can't seem to fall asleep with the other so close.
"He takes a lot of pictures of Jimin," He notes and Yoongi chuckles at that, mumbling something under his breath that the younger couldn't quite catch. "Come on," Yoongi nudges him, "Socialize, my friends are all thrilled to meet you."
Actually, even though Taehyung has doubted Yoongi's words, his friends were thrilled to meet him. Once Jimin and Hoseok made him a part of the conversation he's quickly got the hang of interacting with them. They're great. He doesn't even know why he had been afraid of meeting them before.
After a little while, the group of seven have split into three smaller groups. Namjoon and Seokjin are in the open kitchen, both leaning with their elbows on the counter as they converse quietly. Hoseok and Yoongi are both on the couch now, their legs tangled in the middle and Taehyung swears he's never seen the elder laugh this much – and he's been living with him! It's... nice. Seeing him smile. Nice and distracting. Very distracting. No matter how much butterflies explode in his stomach when he sees the smile, there's always the tight feeling of slight jealousy in his chest.
He keeps glancing at the two on the couch from the corner of his eyes, even as he's seemingly immersed in the conversation with the other two youngest in this motley group. Jimin and Jeongguk are easy to converse with, the three of them hit it off almost immediately and Taehyung somehow already feels like he's known them since forever. He never had those kinds of feelings with his so-called 'friends' from before. It scares him a bit but it feels just so nice. Having someone to talk to. Not like Yoongi is someone he can't talk to, it's just that it feels nice to talk to someone else once in a while.
"So, what's it like living with the scariest of them all," Jeongguk asks with a laugh, popping another piece of Jimin's chocolate in his mouth.
"Yoongi is actually a softie," Taehyung giggles, remembering just this morning when Yoongi has been sitting in the kitchen at five am, eyes slipping shut every second, hair tousled, shirt slipping off his shoulder and rocking a sleeping Chul back and forth. How can someone like this be scary? "I don't think he's very scary."
"You... you don't know?" Jimin's answer is a bit – cryptic, to say at least.
"Don't know what?" Taehyung asks confused. Is there something he doesn't know? There can't be, right? He's living with Yoongi. He sees him almost 24/7, there's no way he doesn't know a thing about what Yoongi does and what he doesn't do. The elder goes to work, he plays with his cousins, he goes grocery shopping, he picks his cousins off from school and he sometimes meets his friends. He helps their neighbors – he does nothing else. What's there to know that he doesn't know?
But there seems to be something. Especially judging by the long look Jeongguk and Jimin share before both of them turn towards him with huge smiles while simultaneously saying, "Nothing." As if that would convince anyone.
"Okay..." Taehyung draws out the 'y' and he considers for a moment calling both of them out for their obvious bullshitting but Jeongguk has already started up another conversation again and he thinks, he thinks he could just ask Yoongi what the other's have been talking about.
He doesn't ask Yoongi about anything. The evening had lasted longer than he would have anticipated and once it had been over he had totally forgotten about the cryptic not-finished conversation he had with the other two.
He might not have found out what Yoongi's supposedly scary streak is – like, okay, the other can look scary with his glare and the dark clothes but seriously? That's just his appearance – but he found more friends and two especially close ones.
The three of them quickly become very close, exchanging phone numbers and texting back and forth every chance they get. (Taehyung is so glad he had his phone with him when he left his old apartment.) They meet often too but since all three of them are actually pretty busy – Jeongguk with college, Jimin and Taehyung with their respective jobs – the other two males visit Taehyung at the café a lot. They hang out there and every now and then, when it's calm and no customers demand his attention, Taehyung chats with them.
Today is such a day, it's late. Taehyung has the last shift and the honor of locking up – a serious sign of Seokjin's trust. The last week he's been picking up different shifts, not dependent on Yoongi's guidance anymore he's now sometimes working when Yoongi's not. The fact that the elder works more shifts than anyone else often makes them still work side by side but today is one of the rare occurrences where Yoongi isn't here.
Which is weird. Because normally it's his shift. Normally, Yoongi works today but he's been weird this morning. Everything's been weird this morning and Taehyung can't quite put his fingers on it – especially because no one tells him a damn thing. Ever. But since Yoongi disappeared around midday, without any explanation (everyone but Taehyung seemed to know where he went to though), the atmosphere at the apartment hadn't been the best.
The usual laughter, giggles, and music aren't there and Taehyung has a hard time keeping his own spirits up while not knowing what the hell is going on. He wants to know what's going in with Yoongi. Actually, he wants to know everything there is a to Yoongi. Every little, insignificant thing.
His heart flutters just thinking about the elder and he can't keep the slight smile from creeping up on his face. Of course, this doesn't go unnoticed by Jimin and Jeongguk opposite from him. The two of them have been making fun of his – how they call it – 'crush' on Yoongi for the whole time they've been here. Now, they're the last two customers inside, the last two persons save for Taehyung and the other boy behind the counter.
They see his smile and because of whatever psychic abilities they possess, they're able to tell exactly what or who he's thinking about. "Yoongi on your mind again?" Jimin snorts before erupting into giggles again. It's unfair, how easy people can tell when he's thinking about the elder male. The last weeks have changed his life, himself so much that he had firstly struggled to develop a new identity for himself. A new him. And this new him, the one who is happy and content, the one who felt like he belonged somewhere definitely secluded a special place for Yoongi in his heart.
He can't help it. And he doesn't think that he wants to. It feels nice – the nervousness, the fluttering nerves, and racing heart. It feels nice liking someone and it definitely feels very nice liking Yoongi. Even though he doesn't know everything about the elder, even though the elder builds high walls around his emotions – that all doesn't matter because Taehyung feels willing to like the other despite that.
That's scary and new for him. He's used to people falling head over heels for him, he's never pined after someone – He never had to and he never felt the need to. Why take a permanent liking to someone if you had various people being willing to sleep with you wherever you went? Taehyung never felt like he needed to find someone to like but then... then Yoongi came along and now Taehyung couldn't help himself.
"So, like, Yoongi has a pretty smile," Taehyung mumbles a little absentminded, eyes unfocused as he keeps staring off into space. He's glad none of the other two are conscious enough to take a picture of his dreamy expression.
"He looks like a cat who just pushed a glass to the floor and is very satisfied with it whenever he smiles." Jeongguk takes a sip from his now probably cold coffee as he raises an eyebrow at the other. Well, he's kind of right. Yoongi looks like a cat sometimes. Feline like eyes, cute button nose and in the morning he stretches just like a cat would do.
"Yeah, cute, right?" He asks and somehow the picture of Yoongi with cat ears and drawn on whiskers appears in his mind – This is dangerous territory. Dangerous territory for his heart. God, he could feel the heat rising to his cheeks. Thank god there is no one who's able to read minds or he might have to shoot that person. Knowing someone knows what he thinks about Yoongi sometimes would be way too embarrassing.
"Sure," Jimin laughs, winking at him and somehow Taehyung thinks – no matter how ridiculous it sounds – that Jimin knows what he just thought about. But before he could test that theory Jeongguk is speaking up again, "Hey, have you noticed that he keeps staring at you?"
"Yoongi?" He asks.
"Who else!?" Taehyung could see the boy behind the counter flinch at Jeongguk's sudden exclamation. He feels a little sorry for him, especially because he lets him clean behind the counter all on his own – well, he'll clean all the tables in exchange.
"Chill – Of course, I do. I can feel his eyes on my body, I can feel them undressing me with every look he takes," Taehyung smirks a little. There's an amused undertone in his voice because a part of him is joking but another part of him actually isn't. He's aware that Yoongi has been looking at him an awful lot in the last time but he has no idea why. He likes joking about the things he actually wants happening – a little wishing never killed nobody, right?
"I don't know man," Jeongguk snorts and Jimin adds chuckling, "Yoongi isn't laughing when he looks at you."
"Ha ha, very funny guys," Taehyung deadpans, "I'm serious though... does he really look at me?"
"Like you're a star or something," Jimin chuckles and the spark of hope inside of his chest gets instantly overshadowed by the sudden anxiety rising within him. He winces but tries not to show any emotions to the others. After all, for them, there is no real reason for him to react badly towards being called a star. Seokjin remains to be the only who recognized him and Taehyung guesses the other's just don't really follow the gossip being discussed in media. Not that he minds that. He actually enjoys being treated like a normal human being for once in his life and if he's being completely honest... He doesn't really think he ever wants to return to the gossiping high society he comes from.
"I really like him... I just – I don't know. At least I think I like him a lot? My heart – it flutters whenever he smiles and I just, I can't sleep anymore. He's so close to me all the time and I can't – my heart can't take it. Sometimes I'm almost about to just grab him and kiss him," Taehyung confesses. Quickly trying to talk over the bubbling anxiety inside of him, trying to forget about the heaviness weighing down on his chest.
It's silent for a few seconds – the other two look at him like they've seen a ghost. It's probably because they've been teasing him a lot but he's never confirmed his liking to the elder male. "That's the cutest shit I've ever heard," Jeongguk gasps, breaking the silence between them and suddenly he and Jimin couldn't stop giggling like they're here, talking about a crush in middle school or something.
Before he's able to even react to their childish behavior his phone vibrates in his pocket. That's weird – he's muted the group chat he's in with the other six and Jimin and Jeongguk are both sitting in front of him, that would leave Yoongi to text him. It would be very weird if it was from one of the other three – they're not as close and mostly communicate through the group chat.
He fishes his phone out of his pocket – it's Yoongi. His heart skips a beat and another stupid smile rises to his lips but vanishes as soon as he reads the message. Now, that's weird.
If you get home, don't go to our apartment. The other's will be waiting for you in 2B.
"What is it?" Jimin asks once he sees his expression. Yeah, what is it? What the hell is going on? Why shouldn't he go home? It's not like he doesn't like hanging out at the old lady's apartment one floor down – no, it has nothing to do with the fact that she always has home baked cookies – but he has a strange feeling that Yoongi won't be there.
"Just a weird message from Yoongi... I think – I think I'm gonna go home now." He ignores the questions of the other two in favor of getting up. "Hey," he addresses the boy behind the counter, "It's alright, I'll finish here and lock up. Go home."
The scene from this midday replays in his mind again. Back then he had been afraid of asking what's going on, now he wishes he had. He wishes he would have asked about the tension, the tears running down Jiae's cheeks as if she's sure Yoongi would never return from wherever he's going to.
Something must be definitely wrong and he won't let himself be lied to. He wants to know exactly what's going on. Everyone else seems to know and he lives in that apartment too – He deserves to know at least a little bit. Leaving him so in the dark is just plain unfair.
When Taehyung arrives at the apartment building he contemplates just going straight towards their apartment and not 2B. He's sure Yoongi will be there but why does he tell him not to come? Why aren't the others there too?
It's unusually quiet in the building, it seems like the heavy, tension-filled atmosphere has overtaken not only their apartment but the neighboring too. The sinking feeling in his stomach only intensifies once he reaches the staircase. In the last second, he decides to do what Yoongi told him and opens the door to 2B – it's unlocked. Like always.
The apartment is quiet, not entirely but the old lady normally has her turntable playing some jazz music to fill the silence – the only noise now is the quiet murmur of voices from the living room.
"Hey..." He calls out uncertainly. The murmuring stops at his voice and there are sudden footsteps hurrying towards him.
"TaTa!" Jiae yells excitedly and at least, she seems to be the only one currently not being affected by the bad atmosphere around here.
"Hey my girl," Taehyung coos and picks her up, she immediately wraps her arms around him and buries her face in his neck. A second later there's someone else clutching at his left hand and as he looks down he stares straight into the large dark eyes of Chul.
In his opinion, Chul seems to be the one who is the most affected by the obvious tension in the air. Taehyung quickly learned that Chul is a very introverted person, someone who doesn't trust easily and rarely speaks. The boy prefers sitting alone instead of playing with his siblings or demanding attention. He liked coloring, drawing but Taehyung has also noticed that he took a liking to him right from the beginning. The little boy can talk without interruption if he wants to but he's been quiet the whole day – even more quiet than normal. He must have noticed the vibe, the tension because he's been always good at picking up shifts in moods and surroundings.
"Taehyung." He looks up as his name is called. Yoongi's aunt stands in the middle of the room, her hair is held up messily and she looks even more tired than she did earlier this morning. But the tiredness and exhaustion in her expression look like something more than just a night of not enough sleep.
He wants to hug her. Comfort her but before he could do that he needs to know what's going on. "Why are we here?" He asks.
She grimaces like it actually hurts her just thinking about whatever's going on and Taehyung can't take it anymore. He needs to know what's going on! "It's... I think it's not our place to tell you..." She sighs, raking her hand through her hair as the other's appear behind her.
"You see, Yoongi – Yoongi sometimes gets into certain moods..." The elder's uncle tries to tell him without actually telling him and it just further frustrates Taehyung.
"Moods?" He asks – still not smarter than before and as confused as ever. Why won't anybody tell him what's going on?
"He's the Hulk," Chul whispers and his voice is so small and quiet that Taehyung almost doesn't catch it.
"Hulk?"
"Yeah, they call him the Hulk because it's the only way they understand what's going on with him," Yoongi's aunt explains carefully, stepping closer to thread her fingers through Chul's hair.
"He's not himself when's angry," Shin adds and slumps down on the couch in the middle of the room, "You don't wanna see him like this."
Okay, now Taehyung definitely wants to see him even more than before. Especially after getting such cryptic information about what's exactly going on with the elder. He needs to see him – even if it's just to check if he's alright if he's okay.
"We'll stay here for tonight," Yoongi's aunt says as she drags a reluctant Jiae out of his arms – it's way past her bedtime anyway but the little girl can be pretty hard to put to sleep. "Don't worry too much, by tomorrow everything is going to be alright."
"But where is Yoongi?" He hopes he's in the apartment.
"He is upstairs..." Taehyung breathes a sigh of relief, almost not catching the whispered 'thankfully' added to the end of the sentence.
"It'll be okay by tomorrow," Yoongi's uncle says but Taehyung definitely doesn't think so. He's going to check on Yoongi and there's no one who can stop him.
Actually, he's pretty sure the elder's aunt could stop him easily that's why at least pretends to stay here for the night. He's supposed to stay out and sleep on the couch, all the other's are cramped in the guest bedroom and even though Jiae has complained, there's seriously no room for her on the couch too.
For good measure, he waits for a little until he sneaks out and climbs the stairs to the third floor. When he tries the door to their apartment he's not surprised to find it locked. He never thought his mission would be easy but he would also never give up because of one locked door. He just wants fucking clarity and if it's better when Yoongi tells him everything – well, then he wants his answer now. (And make sure that Yoongi's alright.)
"Yoongi...?" He calls out carefully, knocking tentatively against the wooden door. A loud thumping noise comes from the other side and he knocks a little harder, voice growing louder. "Yoongi?"
He swallows thickly as strong steps approach the door and it gets ripped open with such force that Taehyung is surprised it didn't come off its hinges. He jumps back in shock.
There, on the other side is Yoongi but he doesn't look like the Yoongi he knows. There's concern swimming in Taehyung's stomach but there's also something else – something very close to fear, threatening to consume him.
"I told you not to come here, didn't I?" Yoongi yells at him and makes the other flinch. He looks... furious. And not only that, he looks like he's been in a fight. There's blood on his lip, his knuckles bloody and dirt smeared over the right half of his face, a few scrapes here and there. "I fucking told you, Taehyung! Are you stupid? Piss off!"
"Yoongi, I – " Taehyung can't even get a whole sentence out. He doesn't know what's going on with Yoongi. The elder – he can't even explain how the elder looks like. It's the whole vibe coming from him that makes alarm bells ring in Taehyung's mind. There's something in Yoongi's eyes, a raw and almost animalistic glint which makes the younger want to run away and hide. He might have a few inches on the elder but he still feels like cowering before him. But the angry fire in his expression is underlaid by a desperation that pleads for someone to help.
"Go the fuck away!" Yoongi snaps and for the first time, Taehyung notices the obvious tremble in the elder's body. Like he's fighting against something. His hands tremble so hard that Taehyung is afraid they might fall off and he's pale. Pale as a piece of paper. Pale, with a disoriented gaze, ragged breathing and there's still blood dripping from his knuckles. "You can't even listen to simple fucking orders!"
"You're bleeding," Taehyung whispers for the lack of a better answer. Yoongi looks like a desperate animal backed into a corner and the younger is just waiting for him to blow up in his face like a bomb. His heart beats in his throat and his mind screams at him to run away but he can't leave Yoongi like this. Not when he obviously needs help at the moment. Even though he doesn't recognize him now.
"Wow, so you have eyes to see?!" Yoongi asks and a breathy chuckle escapes his bleeding lip. He doesn't sound amused, more like he's a psychopath laughing and Taehyung shudders at the sound when the chuckles edge off into hysterical yelling again as tears stream down the elder's face. "Get away, away, away, away! I – I can't – Leave, leave me alone!"
Taehyung almost falls flat on his ass as he stumbles back in shock because Yoongi suddenly punches the doorframe. He winces at the sound – that must have hurt a lot but Yoongi doesn't even flinch. He starts pacing up and down, cursing under his breath as he desperately rubs at his eyes until the skin around them is raw and red. "Fuck, fuck, fuck!" He yells, "What are you doing here?" His voice cracks at the end and he chokes on a sob.
"Yoongi stop – " Taehyung says as the elder starts raking his nails up and down his forearms, leaving thick, red lines behind. But the second he reaches out towards Yoongi, the elder forcefully shoves him away and this time he actually lands on the floor but not before his back hits the opposite wall painfully.
"Don't tell me what to do!" Yoongi yells and Taehyung knows these symptoms. He knows a panic attack when he sees one even though it looks different on Yoongi than it does on himself. During a panic attack he curls in on himself and breaks down into a small boy but Yoongi is kicking and yelling and aggressive. Taehyung shakily gets up on his feet again, wincing at the pain in his back. "Don't – fucking, don't boss me around. I – fuck, I can't!"
Yoongi is close to hyperventilating now and Taehyung just can't stand watching and not doing anything to try and help the other. Some people like to be held during panic attacks, other people can't stand it – Taehyung doesn't know where the thought of holding Yoongi comes from but before he knows it he's stepping forward already.
He accepts the hits against his chest as he engulfs Yoongi in a tight hug, he lets himself be yelled at but he holds onto the other. They sink to the floor, the door still open and the frame digging painfully in the sore spot of Taehyung's back. Yoongi's hits are slowly getting weaker and soon he's clinging onto Taehyung's shirt, tears soaking the fabric as he chokes on sobs and breaths. Taehyung rocks them back and forth on the cold floor, pressing Yoongi's face closer to his chest.
There are tears of his own running down his cheeks and he's not even sure why. Fear? Empathy? Just because? He's supposed to be there for Yoongi now, to catch him as he obviously falls but he's weak again. Too weak to comfort Yoongi the way the elder did with him before.
He doesn't know if his body trembles because Yoongi shakes so bad or because he is shaking. The tears leave a salty taste on his tongue as the fear and tension from before fall off his shoulders. Now he just feels weak. Like he's the one coming down from a panic attack and feeling absolutely and utterly exhausted.
It feels like hours passed until Yoongi's whole body relaxes against him and his breathing evened out completely. Taehyung is careful not to wake him up again as he picks him up and carries him into his room. Yoongi looks so small on the mattress, curled into a ball, hair matted to his face and oh god, there's still blood all over his hands and lips. Taehyung looks down at himself and yes, there's blood on his shirt now but that's a problem he'll deal with later.
His steps are shaky as makes his way back down. He stops in front of the door and his heart stops. There's light coming out from under it which can only mean one thing. He's been caught.
"Taehyung!" Yoongi's aunt whisper yells the second he opens the door. "What did you think you were doing?!"
He feels like crying again. His hands tremble and it's only now that he realizes how tensed he's been. All the fear comes crashing down on him and he chokes out a small sob. "I just, I wanted to help," he whispers and again, like before there's a small, warm hand enclosing his own. Chul holds onto him tightly. As if he wants to comfort him without really knowing why. So he does it in his own way. Silently but at the moment Taehyung couldn't be more thankful because of the hold of this tiny eight-year-old boy.
"Did he hurt you?" Yoongi's aunt gasps once her eyes land on the blood on his shirt and he has half the mind to shake his head as she's fussing over him. "He gets like this regularly, he knows how to deal with it on his own. There's a reason why he wants no one to see him like that."
"I'm sorry but... he's asleep now. We can go up again..."
Taehyung understands. He understands it now.
Not completely. He still has no idea what's going on but he understands why they're hiding down here. Why Yoongi told him not to come home. He was only protecting him and Taehyung should have listened to him. That's what he's still thinking about as they all make their way up the stairs again. No one talks once they reach the apartment and soon Taehyung finds himself staring at a sleeping Yoongi once again.
Maybe he should have listened – but if he did Yoongi would have gone through this alone. He's already bloody, Taehyung doesn't like to imagine what else could have happened or what Yoongi might have done if he hadn't come up here.
He slides down the wall opposite of the occupied mattress and lets his head thump against the wall. This is going to be a lot to explain tomorrow morning but for now, it's important that Yoongi is okay and asleep.
For now, this is enough.
Bạn đang đọc truyện trên: Truyen3h.Co