Kabanata 29
Kabanata 29
"Oh my God..." Tita Natalie murmured again while staring at my round stomach. "You are pregnant, darling."
I nodded, smiling at her. She reached for my stomach again and gaped in amazement.
"I have a grandchild na?" she mumbled and I nodded again.
"Girl po, Tita." I answered and to my shock, she screamed a little at halos talunin ako ng yakap.
It made me laugh, dahil nga sa bilugan na ang tiyan ko ay hindi niya ako mayakap ng maayos kaya pumunta siya sa tagiliran ko.
"Alam ba agad ni Angelo ito, 'nak?" she asked after hugging me, smiling.
I glanced at him still lying on the bed, unconscious.
"Akala ko nga po hindi," I murmured, "but then when I was thinking to him with my disguised self, nakwento niyang buntis ako."
"Oh, I didn't know you are pregnant." She uttered sadly and it made my heart ache.
"Sorry po, Tita." I sighed, "it was my fault, I should've told you—"
"Oh, no! No. Don't think that way, Philie. It's definitely fine." She said and stared at my stomach, "it wasn't your fault you didn't tell him about this." She then glared at her husband sideways who's been sipping on his bottled water.
"Kasalanan 'to ng asawa ko." She murmured.
Tito Terrence choke on his water, napatawa naman ako roon.
"W-what?" Tito coughed more, "ako na naman, Sena—"
"Bakit, hindi ba?" Tita pouted but then walked closer her husband and dried the drop of water on his chin. "Bakit ka kasi gago dati? Tignan mo 'yang karma mo umabot sa mga anak mo."
Tito then chuckled. His jet black eyes resembling my husband's a lot stared through her as she held her waist.
"I'm sorry, babe. I love you." He said sweetly. "Let me give you a kiss." He gave her a smack.
Tita's eyes softened. Humawak siya sa pisngi nito at 'di ko maiwasang kiligin doon.
"Kaya ako nasasabihang kerengkeng kapag dating sa 'yo, Samaniego." She hissed and slapped his cheek playfully. "Pagsabihan mo 'yang mga anak mo, ah? Kung hindi ako na ang magbabalik niyan sa matris ko."
We heard a groan. Sabay-sabay kaming napalingon sa hospital bed at napasinghap ako nang biglang mapaupo si Gelo at nakita kaagad ang magulang niya.
"M-mom!" he called, "where's my wife?!"
Ngumuso ako, itinaas ko ang kamay mula sa gilid niya at nginuso ako ni Tita kaya bumaling sa akin si Gelo na nakaawang na ang labi.
"Philie..." he called.
"Hello, Elsa." I smiled, "pero 'di mo na ako wife—" a loud scream left my lips when he abruptly stood from the bed, sa sobrang pagmamadali niya ay sumabit ang paa niya at nahulog siya sa lapag.
"Oh my God, Dean Angelo! Ang ulo mo!" eksaheradang sigaw ni Tita at napatakbo ako palapit.
"Gusto mo ulit mabagok?!" Tita hissed at him.
"Fuck!" he cursed and sat on the floor, nang makita niya akong palapit ay parang wala lang siyang tumayo. Walang pasabing sinugod ako ng yakap pero 'di niya magawa dahil sa tiyan ko.
"Ah, sa side na lang, Gelo." I murmured and smiled at mabilis siyang pumihit at niyakap ako sa tagiliran. I almost fell with his sudden excitement.
Natawa ako, naaaliw sa kanya pero napawi iyon nang sumubsob siya sa balikat ko. Kasabay no'n ang mahihina niyang hikbi at mas pagyakap sa akin.
"I missed you, babe." He whispered and hugged me more. "I-I missed you, I love you."
His voice broke. Nagkatinginan kami ni Tita Natalie at ngumiti siya sa akin at tumango. She pointed the door and when I nodded, she proceeded into pulling Tito Terrence towards the door.
"Excuse us for a while, Philie." Tito said kaya tumango ako at pinagmasdan silang paalis.
Nang mawala na sila ay 'tsaka lang ako bumaling kay Angelo. Naramdaman ko ang patak ng luha niya sa balikat ko kaya sumikip ang dibdib ko.
"Gelo?" I called and he moved his face gently from my shoulder to glance my way. "Upo tayo."
He nodded, his eyes are bloodshot and he looked like a lost kid as I held his warm palm and pulled him towards the sofa.
Pagkaupo pa lang namin ay walang-imik na siyang yumakap pabalik at isinubsob ang mukha sa balikat ko. Kasabay nito ay ang paghawak niya sa tiyan ko at paghalik sa balikat ko.
"She's...she's almost eight months?" he whispered, inabot ko naman ang kanyang pisngi para punasan ang kanyang luha.
"Hmm..." marahang sagot ko, "she's a girl, sabi mo nga kanina."
He chuckled lowly, even if he's sniffing. He managed to cupped my cheek with his other palm to look at me.
"H-how did you turn your voice like that?" bakas ang pagtataka sa boses niya. Ang malambing na mata ay nakatitig sa akin.
"Like what?" I asked using my small voice and suddenly laughed when he looked much more confused.
"How..." he moistened his lower lip, "that sounded like a piggy's voice, babe."
Nawala ang ngisi ko. Tinampal ko siya at sinamaan ng tingin. Napatawa naman ang huli at niyakap ako sabay halik sa pisngi.
"Napakapasmado ng bibig mo, Samaniego, ha?" sinimangutan ko na.
"Kidding," he smirked amusingly, his eyes still bloodshot, "but it's...I really thought your voice sounded like yours but not really."
"Nag-rehearse nga kasi kami nina Phoebe, Gelo." I explained, "p'wede nga raw ako mag-voice actor sa mga palabas—"
"Na horror?" he asked again.
"Are you insulting my voice?!" I slapped his legs harshly. Napaigik siya sa sakit at napahawak doon pero ngumisi na naman.
"Philomena," he called, "it's a compliment, babe. I really in the verge of laughing when I heard that voice but it was rude."
"Ang sama mo?" pinaliit ko ang boses, "pangit ba talaga?"
"Not really," he tilted his head, "can I hear an oink-oink?"
"Oink-oink." I mumbled and laughed when he hugged me again on the side and kissed my cheek for a very long time.
"I love you, I love you." Bulong niya bago isinandal ang mukha sa aking pisngi. "Mahal na mahal ko kayo, Philie."
It made my heart swell, lalo na nang mabilis siyang umalis sa tabi ko at mayamaya'y nakaluhod na sa harapan ko. Katapat ang tiyan ko.
Hesitantly, he reached for it. It was as if he was scared he'd break it at first kaya kinuha ko na ang kamay niya at mas pinirmi iyon.
"It's okay," I murmured and gave him an assuring smile.
He gulped harshly, his lips parted a little when his warm hands touched it and we both felt a kick.
"Shit..." he murmured.
"Ang bata, Gelo." I told him playfully kaya napasinghap siya at mas umayos ng luhod.
"I'm sorry, baby." He said, "I should watch my words next time."
Nangiti akong lalo habang nakatitig sa kanya. His eyes are twinkling. It was emotionless, cold at most times but right now, I see nothing but amusement and adoration.
"I'm really a father now," he mumbled when he felt our daughter kicking again. "H-hello there, baby. This is your Daddy."
I was smiling but it vanished and was replaced by a small pout when his eyes teared up again. Nakangiti man ay muling nahulog ang luha sa mga mata niya na dali-dali niya ring pinunasan at inilapit ang mukha sa tiyan ko.
"Baby, this is Daddy." He whispered on my stomach and planted a small kiss. "I love you so much, mahal na mahal ko kayo ng Mommy mo."
I felt my cheeks dampened, hinawi ko ang luha roon bago inabot ang buhok ni Angelo dahil abala siya sa paghalik ng tiyan ko.
"I love you..." he whispered on my stomach again, "t-thank you for letting me know your gender and hearing your h-heartbeats, baby."
I sniffed, bumaba ang kamay ko sa batok ni Angelo nang maramdaman ko ang basa sa damit ko dahil sa pagbuhos ng kanyang luha.
He clutched my dress and sat on the floor, still hugging my waist with his ears in front of my belly.
I felt a kick again and that's when he let out a small chuckle then tilted his head to look at me.
"She kicked,"
"Sinipa ka niya," I touched his gaze, "kasi na-realize niya na naging Elsa ang Tatay niya."
Bumagsak ang balikat niya, he glared at me sideways and it made me laugh.
"Gelo?" I called.
"Hmm?"
"Do you wanna build a snowman?" I asked in a teasing, small voice.
"Ikaw," he stood from the ground, binalot niya ako ng yakap at puro tawa lang ang lumabas sa labi ko nang paulanan niya ng halik ang mukha ko. "Why didn't you tell me you're going home?"
"Dapat alam mo," tawa ko at hinuli ang mata niya, "ini-stalk mo pala 'ko sa ibang bansa, ah?"
"I don't," he said seriously kaya tinaasan ko ng kilay. "That's just once a week." Maang pa niyang sabi kaya kinurot ko ang pisngi.
"Surprise? Galing ko um-acting, ano?" I asked, "may new career na akong voice actress, Gelo. Stage name, Assunta D. Makaire."
"Gelong Pastol," he muttered and smirked, "baka gusto mong ikaw ang pastulin ko?"
"Ohh..." bumilog ang bibig, "sure." Ngisi ko.
Mas lumakas ang tawa niya. It made my heart jump in adoration, nanliit ang mata niya at lumitaw ang maliit na dimple sa kanyang pisngi roon. Sinapo niya ang pisngi ko at nahulog ang talukap ng mata ko nang hagkan niya ang noo ko.
"Philomena?" he called.
"Hmm?"
"Do you wanna make more babies?" he whispered.
Nawala ang ngiti ko at namilog ang mata.
"Hoy, ikaw!" sumimangot ako, "why not?" ngiti ko rin pabalik pero nang marinig namin ang pagbukas ng pinto ay natahimik din kaming dalawa.
"Hello, mga kababayan!" I stood happily when I saw Blaze entering the room with our friends.
"Guys!" I greeted.
"Philie, ang Reyna ng Dinibdibang Lupa ng San Isidro! Oh, you really are pregnant!" Blaze called, "na-miss kita, ah! Payakap nga!"
But before I could even give him a hug, isang mapang-akin na yakap na ang nakuha ko sa tagiliran kaya 'di ako nakagalaw.
"Ano? Kuya nga?" Blaze whined at him.
"Shut up." Angelo hissed coldly, "this is my woman."
"What?" napahawak sa dibdib ang kapatid niya, "akala mo naman aagawin, mayro'n ako—"
"Mayro'n pa ba?" Migo asked, stopping Blaze who frowned at him.
"Gago." He hissed.
It made me curious, nilingon ko si Angelo na umuungot na naman sa balikat ko kaya 'di ko na naitanong.
"Tao po!" the door opened again, napahiwalay na ako kay Gelo nang makita ko na ang mga babae. "Philie, kumusta ang acting?!" the two exclaimed.
"Best actress na, Reyna pa ng Dinibdibang Lupa ng San Isidro...Assunta D. Makaire." I gave them a bow at para kaming tangang nagyayakapan doon pero 'di kami magkasalubong dahil nahaharang ang tiyan ko.
I showed the girls the ultrasound I had and announced the gender. Dala-dala rin ni Chance ang anak niya kaya nilaro naming tatlo at palangiti ang cute na si Cookie.
"Ilan daw tayo rito? Bibili ng pagkain si Tita Natalie." Tanong ni Castiel pagkapasok. Migo started counting around at nang sumulyap ako kay Gelo ay nakatitig sa akin.
He was seriously resting his back on the sofa and staring at me intently. I caught his eyes and gave a wink at nakita ko kung paano siya matigilan pero naglaho ang lamig sa mata at napalitan ng kung ano.
His lips lifted for a sly smirk, mas humalukipkip siya roon at nagpigil ng ngiti. Kunwari ay seryoso pa.
Sumandal din ako sa upuan ko, hinayaan ko ang dalawang nagkikwentuhan sa aking tabi. I crossed my legs, my dress hitched up and his eyes landed on it.
I noticed how his eyes darkened at that. His adam's apple moved sensually with his clenched jaw.
Hinuli ko ang tingin niya at iginalaw ang kilay ko.
"Ano?" I mouthed.
Muling tumaas ang sulok ng labi niya, "mamaya ka sa 'kin." He mouthed back kaya napatakip ako sa bibig pero tuwang-tuwa na naman.
I gave him a quick nod while shyly biting my lower lip.
He smirked. I was startled too when he gave me a playful wink.
"Hala ka, gago! Kumindat ka ba, Kuya?!" sigaw ni Blaze roon kaya nagtinginan ang lahat kay Angelo na nagulat din.
Mula sa pagkindat ay kinurap-kurap ni Angelo ang isang mata at umayos ng upo sabay punas sa mata niya.
"N-no..." he cleared his throat, "s-something just got inside my eye—"
"Kumindat ka, nahuli ko rin 'yon!" Chance exclaimed while shaking the bottle of milk he's preparing for his son na buhat ni Castiel.
"I'm not—"
"Nice naman! Everyone, ang Elsa, Hari ng Dinibdibang Lupa ng San Isidro at Candidate number six ay kumikindat na! huling-huli sa akto!" Castiel exclaimed.
"H-hindi nga!" he growled, "gago—"
"Shh, ang Cookie ko!" Chance hissed kaya natahimik si Gelo at napasulyap kay Cookie na nanunuod lang sa amin pero ngumingiti-ngiti kaya lumitaw ang biloy niya.
"Sorry," he cleared his throat and smiled at the kid, "sorry, Cookie. Your father's just an ass—"
"Dean Angelo!" I warned kaya namilog ang mata niya at sumulyap sa akin.
"Sorry, babe." He said like a puppy, earning laughters around.
"Balita ko raw, Kuya. Nahimatay ka." Blaze even retorted and when the two started wrestling inside the room, that's when Tita Nat entered with Tito Terrence and when she her sons, she closed her eyes tightly.
"Hindi ko mga anak 'yan," turo niya sa dalawang nagra-rambol doon. "Nasaan na ba ang Amber ko?"
"Mommy, si Kuya nag-umpisa—" Blaze called.
"Shh," napahawak si Tita sa noo niya, "isa ka pa, ah? 'Di pa 'ko tapos sa 'yo, Blaze?"
"Mom, I'm still looking for her—"
"Bakit ba ganito ang mga anak ko?" she gasped, "ay, hindi ko na pala kayo anak." Sumulyap siya kay Tito Terrence na natatawa roon sa gilid pero nagseryoso nang makita ang masamang tingin ng asawa.
"Tinatawa mo?"
"Nothing, Sena-babe." He smiled innocently at her but she gasped and pulled her hair.
"Ahh!" she gasped loudly, "ibabalik ko 'yang dalawang anak mo sa itlog mo, sinasabi ko sa 'yo!" she hissed and Tito lost the color on his face, making everyone chuckle at her remark.
I was informed that I could go back to work after I give birth so I was happy about it.
"Philie! Welcome back!" I let out a giggle when I saw him.
"Doc Jon!" I exclaimed happily and his eyes widened upon seeing my stomach.
"Wow, you are pregnant!" he exclaimed and accepted my hug when I gave him one.
"Yep, ninong ka, ah?" I asked happily and he nodded, a smile etched on his lips.
"I missed you, hinahanap ka ng mga bata sa pedia ward." Aniya, "I wasn't so sure if you're gonna be back, you didn't even tell me you are urgently leaving. Nalaman ko lang sa HR."
"I'm very sorry, Doc." I sighed, "I just have to breathe and it was an impulsive decision, I know, but I think that's what's best for me. Alam mo naman 'yong nangyari noon."
"Stacy," he murmured and nodded, "I understand. It's okay. Will you be back now?"
"Yes," I smiled, "pagkatapos kong manganak siguro, ayaw muna ako pagtrabahuhin ni Angelo."
"I see," he smiled again, "good thing you're here now, if only you know how grumpy your husband is when you weren't here. He's frowning all the time. Minsan nga kulang na lang magtawag kaming bumbero at baka biglang bumuga ng apoy."
Natawa ako roon pero nawala ang ngisi ko nang makita ang malaking banner na nakasabit sa handle ng second floor.
"Oh my...gosh." I covered my mouth in shock and pointed it. "Ano 'yan?!"
Napuno ng halakhak ang tainga ko nang tumawa si Doc, nilingon ko siya at namumula na ang mukha niya.
"Sina Nurse Phoebe 'yan," he beamed, "I was laughing my ass out too when I saw it."
Nakanganga lang akong kinuha ang phone at pinicturan ang banner at napahagalpak ng tawa.
It was Angelo, like the poster posted on facebook too. In his Hari ng Dinibdibang Lupa black shirt, may number six pa sa tagiliran at nakabusangot sa camera. May bilog-bilog pa ro'n na nadagdag na may recap ng performance niya, mas malaki ang picture niya na may suot na Elsa costume kaya napahagalpak ako.
Congratulations to Dr. Dean Angelo Samaniego for winning the Hari ng Dinibdibang Lupa ng San Isidro! Your Golden City family is proud of you!
The familiar caption is hilarious, lalo na nang makita ko ang picture ng mga kaibigan sa ibaba na naka-heart pa sa kamay.
"Parang tatakbo ng konsehal ang mga taong 'to," tawa ko pa, "kulang na lang kumanta sila ng nobody, nobody but you."
"Mukha siyang magwawala no'ng nakita 'yan. Pinagsasakal niya sina Doc Castiel at si Sir Chance." He laughed, "pero alam mo? Ayaw na niya ipatanggal ngayon."
"Oh, bakit?" I asked, confused.
"Noong kumalat na ikaw 'yong Reyna noon, proud na proud na siya." He laughed, "I really didn't know Dr. Samaniego has that side on him. I remembered when I told the nurses from our department na ikaw ang Reyna doon sa inyo, nagulat ako sumingit siya, alam mo anong sabi?"
"What?" I asked, amused.
"Na siya raw ang Hari kaya bagay na bagay kayo." Humagalpak siya, "I was shocked too, Philie. Ngising-ngisi pa siya no'n habang tinitignan akong nakanganga sa kanya."
I texted Angelo I'm gonna visit the pedia department too since I am here now at pinayagan naman niya ako dahil may pinaasikaso rin sa kanya si Tito Terrence.
"Dra. Philie!" I was overwhelmed when the kids ran towards my direction upon seeing me, making my heart swell. "Babalik ka na po ba, Dra.? Miss ka na po namin! Wala na po mag-play sa amin ng barbies!" the kids called.
I was a bit sad, missing that familiar jolly presence we are having most of the times before. Stacy's warm and sweet smiles, her talkative and jolly voice but now...it was gone.
I shouldn't feel sad kaya mas sumubok akong maging buhay.
"Yes, kids." I answered with a smile, "after Dra. Philie gave birth, I'll be back. Tapos 'yong baby ko, sasali na sa play."
"Baby ninyo po ni Papa Dean si baby po?" they asked.
"Yes po," I murmured and showed them the ultrasound, "look here, kids. Baby girl ang baby ni Dra. Philie at Papa Dean." Nangiti ako nang makita ang saya sa mga mata nila.
I missed the kids so much that I completely lost track of the time. Kung hindi lang nagsabi ang Nurses at si Doc Jon na kailangan na magpahinga ng mga bata ay hindi ko maaalala.
I totally forgot Gelo too and got preoccupied with the kids kaya nagulat ako nang makita siyang nakasandal sa upuan sa tapat lang ng ward at natutulog. His arms are crossed on his chest with his head hanging low.
Gumalaw ang ulo niya nang mahulog pero inayos niya 'yon kaya nauntog at napamulat, gulat na napatayo nang makita ako.
"Ayan, dahan-dahan nga." I commented and walked closer to him, "kapag 'yang ulo mo nabagok na naman, ewan ko na lang talaga sa 'yo, Samaniego."
He chuckled, tumungo siya pagkaabot sa akin at yumakap sa baywang ko sabay halik sa aking pisngi.
"You had fun with the kids?" he whispered.
"Oo, na-miss ko." Mahinang sagot ko at humawak sa baywang niya, "kanina ka pa ba? Sana pinasok mo na ako."
Hindi siya umimik kaagad, narinig ko pa ang tawa kaya nilingon ko na at nagtatago na siya ng ngisi.
"Huh?" I asked pero mas lumapit lang siya sa tainga ko at bumulong.
"Matagal naman na kitang pinasok," he whispered huskily, I froze when he touched my stomach. "Pinutok pa nga sa loob—"
"Shh!" bigla kong tinakpan ang bibig niya at eskandalosang nilingon ang paligid, nakahinga lang nang matantong kami lang ang nasa hallway.
I pulled my hand out when his naughty eyes stared at me teasingly.
"Ikaw talaga..." kinurot ko ang pisngi niya, "okay lang na magbastusan pero kapag tayong dalawa lang, okay?"
"Okay," he agreed like an obedient child.
"Good boy," I smiled at him, "saan na tayo? Are we going home?" I asked.
Hindi na naman siya kaagad umimik. His eyes twinkled, in the bright light in the hallway, I caught how his black orbs glistened.
"Bakit?" malambing kong sabi nang kumislap iyon at nakagat niya ang labi.
"Can you...say it again?" he asked.
"'Yong?" nagtataka pa ako, "I was just asking if we're going home?"
He stiffened. Naguguluhan ako at 'di maintindihan kung paano magre-react nang kumurap siya at nahulog ang butil ng luha sa pisngi.
My mouth dramatically parted, "Angelo?"
"Home..." he mumbled and reached for my palm and gave it a small caressed. "We're going home?"
That's when it dawned to me. I flashed a sweet smile, mas tumungo siya at napatawa sabay subsob sa aking balikat.
"I'm going home," he whispered on my shoulder. "I'm going home."
"Me too," marahang bulong ko at hinalikan ang buhok niya, "we're going home. H'wag ka na umiyak, babe."
He moved away, squinting his eyes shut, feeling how my fingers brushed on his cheek while removing his tears.
"I love you," he whispered and caught my wrist before intertwining his fingers against mine.
"I..." I grinned when he opened his eyes, anticipating my answer. "I'm hungry, Gelo."
Ngumuso siya, "walang I love you too?"
"Mamaya na, gutom pa 'ko, eh." I shrugged, earning a small laugh from him before placing his other hand on my shoulder to assist me.
"Alright, bubusugin ko muna ang anak ko ang Mommy niya ng pagmamahal at pagkain," bulong-bulong niya at naglakad na. "We're going home."
"Oo, uuwi na." I answered, "congrats, Gelo. Promoted ka na, 'di ka na batang hamog." I teased and that's when he glared at me.
Sobra pa sa maingat si Gelo nang nasa biyahe kami. Medyo maingat na siya noon pero ngayon ay sobra na.
"Seryoso ba, Angelo?" I asked, "ano ba 'to, pagong?"
"I have to drive slowly, Philomena." He explained, "mahirap na, I won't risk you and our baby."
Kulang na lang ay mag-question mark ang mukha ko. Napatalon naman sa gulat nang makarinig ng malakas na busina kaya napahawak ako sa seatbelts.
"Ang bagal ninyo!" we stopped when a car chose to make an overtake, "napakabagal, 'di lang kayo ang tao sa kalsada!"
"Was it my fault you're a reckless driver—"
"Sorry po!" I exclaimed and smacked the frowning Angelo, nasa bingit nan ang pagsigaw doon habang masama ang tingin. "Ano ba, Angelo!"
He tsk-ed, medyo binilisan niya ang paandar pero para pa rin kaming nasa lamay kaya nasapo ko na ang mukha.
"Angelo!" I smacked him.
"What?" he whined, "ayaw kong maalog kayo ng anak ko, Philomena—"
"Alam mo, hindi ako mamamatay sa driving skills mo. Alam mo sa'n ako mamatay?" I looked at him, "sa gutom. Gutom na gutom na kami ni baby, Dean Angelo. 'Di ko na kaya 'to, 50/50 na kami."
That was his trigger point, ngising-ngisi ako nang marating namin ang condo unit niya nang wala pang ten minutes dahil bumilis na siya.
"Gelo? Password?" I asked when we got in front of it.
Tumungo siya, doon ko rin natantong natanggal ang sintas ng sneakers ko kaya inaayos niya.
"Our wedding date," he answered, stopping me.
Kinagat ko ang labi, tahimik na pinindot iyon at halos tumili-tili nang bumukas nga.
Nang makapasok kami ay ngiting-ngiti ako, lalo na nang mag-inarte at hinayaan niya rin.
"Babe, buhat ako!" I raised my hand. He caught me, I was giggling when he carried me in a bridal style and looked down.
"Bigat," he commented.
"Excuse me?!" I groaned, and kicked my feet but he carried me more and grinned.
"Kidding, ang gaan-gaan nga ng mahal kong Philomena, eh." He said and moved his arms carrying me like I'm some kind of barbel. "Pampadagdag muscles din 'to, Philie."
"Muscles ka riyan," bulong ko. "Kaka-muscle mo diyan putok na putok tuloy 'yong Elsa costume mo no'ng pageant!"
"At least, tuwang-tuwa ka." Sulyap niya sa akin, "I may embarrass myself all the time but who cares, anyway? As long as you're happy, I am too. Fuck my dignity, at least Hari ako ng Dinibdibang Lupa ng San Isidro. Tho, may hiling pa rin ako."
"Oh?" kumapit akong lalo sa balikat niya. "Ano?"
"Maging Hari na rin ng puso mo," sulyap niya sa akin, "when kaya?"
That was our talk until we reached his bedroom, kunot na kunot naman ang noo ko nang ihiga niya ako sa kama.
"H-hoy, ano 'to?" I looked around his room, "akala ko ba kakain?"
Hindi siya sumagot, nagwala naman ang puso ko nang lumuhod siya sa gilid ng kama at kinalas ang dress shirt niya.
"Samaniego?!" I hissed.
"Hmm, kakain nga." Aniya sabay tingin sa akin at kalas ng butones. "Anong ulam gusto mo?"
I immediately felt hot, tila nagtaasan ang balahibo ko kaya napaupo ako sa kama at pinagmasdan siya.
"Gusto ko ng..." kinagat ko ang labi at walang-habas na tumingin sa kanyang ulo hanggang doon. "Hotdog mo."
He tilted his head when he removed his shirt, untucking it from his pants. Nang lumantad sa akin ang dibdib niya ay nahulog mula roon ang kwintas niya kung nasaan ang wedding ring kung soon.
It turned me on more, lumunok ako ng marahas. I was getting hornier and hornier kaya kinalas ko na rin ang bra ko mula sa likod.
He moved closer, crawling towards me. Sumandal ako sa headboard ng kama nang humawak siya sa banda roon.
His scent enveloped my nostrils, invading my system. Nang ikulong niya sa pagitan ng kanyang hita ang hita ko at lumuhod sa harapan ay mas nag-init ang pakiramdam ko.
I'm almost eight months with our baby but why...why I still have this intense hots for him, huh? why?
My eyes landed on his ripped body, his six-pack abs are displayed in front of me.
"Sarap naman," I mumbled and touched it affectionately, halos mapaso pa.
"Gusto mo?" he asked and tilted my chin to meet my eyes.
"I do..." I whispered, "gustong-gusto."
He moved his head down that my eyes shut that instant. Humaba ang nguso ko at nag-antay ng halik pero walang dumating, sa halip ay ang tawa lang ng kumag kaya napamulat na ako.
"I-I'm sorry, babe. You're adorable." He laughed and gave me a quick kiss on the forehead. "Let me just get my shirt. I love you, lutuan na kita ng hotdog."
Nalaglag ang panga ko nang may kinuha siya sa may headboard, pinakita pa niya sa akin ang shirt niya bago walang-hiyang nagbihis, tinatakpan ang pasalubong kong paldesal at ang hotdog ko sana ay nawala nang tumayo siya mula sa pagkakaluhod.
"Your clothes' in the closet, babe." He said and entered the bathroom, "let me fix a warm bath for you."
That night, I was happy finally seeing Angelo this way again. Like before, serious but talkative to me. We ate together, kinuha ko ang hotdog miski ang nasa plato niya pero hindi siya nagreklamo, tatawa-tawa pang pinagmasdan akong kumain.
Noong matutulog na ay hindi ko pa siya pinatabi sa akin.
"Why not?" he asked, pouting.
"Kasi..." humawak ako sa baba, "may anak na tayo pero s'yempre, 'di naman ako gano'n kakire sa 'yo."
"What?" he laughed.
"Choosy kasi ako," I pointed myself. "Kaya dahil 'di pa tayo mag-boyfriend, doon ka muna sa guestroom."
"Philie..." he whined but I lifted my hand and waved at him.
"Bye-bye!" I exclaimed happily and grinned, closing the door on his face.
But it's late at night and I still couldn't sleep. Pabiling-biling ako sa higaan at nalulungkot kaya tumayo ako. I touched my stomach and sighed sadly.
"Hanap natin si Daddy, baby?" I murmured and when I felt her kicked, I got no choice but to stand.
"Kiwi...kiwi...kiwi." I chanted as I walked towards his room, hopping. "Gusto ko Kiwi, gusto ko Gelo."
I chuckled when I realized my stomach looked like I just swallowed a whole fruit of a large watermelon. P'wede na nga raw ang gawing pang-bowling.
I touched my stomach more, "Gelo...Gelo...Gelo!" I chanted too. "Gusto ko kain si Gelo!"
The same time I said that, the door opened. Namilog ang mata ko nang makita si Angelo na gulat na gulat kaya mabilis kong ipinikit ang mata.
"Babe?" he called.
Shit, shit, shit!
I almost cursed under my breath.
"Philie..." he called when I walked towards his room with my eyes closed. "What?" he asked pero tuloy-tuloy lang ako.
Dahil nga nakapikit ay wala akong nakikita kaya pakapa-kapa ako.
"Are you sleeping?" he asked and held my arm.
"Oo," I answered but stopped when he laughed.
"Oh, you are." He said, his voice laced with amusement.
Bakit siya natutuwa? 'Di ba siya naniniwala sa 'kin?!
"Sleep walking 'to," I murmured and he laughed more kaya kumunot ang noo ko, dumaing pa nang tumama ang tuhod kung saan.
"Oh, I see." He said with amusement, "my piglet is sleep walking. What an adorable pregnant babe. Oink-oink."
Ang lalaking 'to...
Binuhat niya ako, kumapit naman ako sa kanya habang nakapikit na rin at naramdaman ang pagpahiga niya sa akin sa kama bago tumabi, he held my waist after fixing our comforter. His breath touched my cheek when he cuddled me, dahilan para mangiti ako.
I moved my body closer and tried hugging him back.
"What a sweet babe," he whispered, "good night, Philie. Good night, baby. I have work tomorrow but I will cook you breakfast, what would you like to eat?"
"Hotdog..." bulong ko sabay dakma no'n at napamulat na nang mata nang halos mahulog siya, kasabay ng tawa ko ay ang pisil niya sa pisngi ko.
I woke with Angelo gone, he even left a sticky note saying he has an urgent patient. Napaaga ata ang panganganak kaya kailangan niyang umalis kaagad bago pa ako magising.
But of course, being a thoughtful man he is, he cooked me breakfast and yes, it's a hotdog. May Kiwi pa roon kaya kinikilig na naupo ako sa may stool.
"Hello, Nanay?" I smiled upon greeting her and waved at the video.
"Nasaan ka, anak? Bakit 'di kita makita? Saan ba 'yong Tatay mo, sinasabi na ngang 'di 'ko marunong sa video-video na 'to!" a chuckle left my lips when I noticed Nanay covering the camera kaya 'di niya ako makita.
"Tinatakpan mo kasi ang camera, Nay." Sabi ko at kumuha ng Kiwi sabay kain.
"Huh? Paano 'to?"
"Tanggalin mo ang kamay mo sa camera, Nay." I muttered, "may makikita kang Diyosa."
She moved her hand, nagpo-pose pa ako nang makita na niya ako sa camera.
"Ay, susmiyo marimar!" she exclaimed when she saw me posing in the camera.
"Oh, 'di ba, Nay?" I grinned, "Diyosa!"
"Diyosa nga," tango-tango niya kaya nangisi na ako.
"I told 'ya—"
"Diyosa ng karimlan." She commented, definitely stopping me from taking cute poses in the camera.
"Nanay nga!" I whined when she began teasing me again, "ganyan ka ba talaga sa nag-iisa mong anak? Reyna pa 'to sa lagay na 'to, ah?"
"Alam mo ba, Philomena, gumanda ulit ang panahon dito. Lumitaw na ulit 'yong araw no'ng umalis ka. Mas yumabong nga ang mga palay ng Tatay mo." She teased and when I began glaring at her, doon na siya tuwang-tuwa.
My Nanay is fond of teasing me, she likes making fun of me pero sa kabila no'n ay mahal na mahal niya ako. Ang Tatay ko naman ay siyang superhero ko, ang nagtatanggol sa akin kapag natutuwa na si Nanay na alaskahin ako kahit 'di naman ako gatas.
I wasn't their biological daughter, I am an orphan. S'werte nga nina Nanay at Diyosa ang nakuha nilang anak kaya mapapa-thank you, Lord ka na lang.
I laughed with my crazy thoughts and shook my head.
But despite the thought that I was not from them, I was still lucky because I had them. They raised me to be the woman I am now. They raised me to become this strong, this competitive and pretty and I am always grateful for that.
Thinking of it, I wasn't really looking for my real parents because I had enough love from my Nanay at Tatay. Noong bata ako, noong nag-uumpisa pa lang ang laban ko ay wala akong totoong naging kaibigan at ngayon? Marami na sila. I have my kind in-laws, a husband—well, technically no. Naglalandian lang naman kami pero manliligaw ko pa lang daw siya kahit may baby girl na kami.
Despite the challenges I had, despite the pain, I am lucky I still have family and friends to look after me. Someone who I could lean on when I needed some shoulder. My Angelo, that snob Elsa may look pretty stiff and cold but he's warm to me.
The cold never bothered me, anyway.
I have my Nanay and Tatay. Malungkot isipin na hindi ko kilala ang mga totoong magulang but what's sadder for me is having and knowing who your biological parents is but not feeling of having one.
"Sorry..." my eyes remained staring at Samantha who called me first when she got released in the hospital. "I was...a mess. It was Dean who made me feel I am important before, the reason why I got so attached to him."
Hindi ako sumagot, hinayaan ko siyang nagsasalita sa harapan ko habang nakatungo at nanunubig ang mga mata.
"Before, he was there for me, always. Noong walang pakialam ang mga magulang ko, nand'yan siya para samahan ako. I know he's always cold, he rarely laughs around me but his presence alone—it was enough. I felt like I was needed, that someone cared for me." She chuckled lowly, "sabi ko nga, mahal na mahal siguro ako ni Dean kaya ang lakas ng loob ko na maging gano'n. I became a whining kid, a demanding one. I even threatened him I'd break up with him if he won't quit his job."
"He loved his job, Sam. You can't take it away from him."
"I know," she nodded, "but I was selfish. Ang yabang kung isiping pipiliin niya ako kaysa sa trabaho pero mas mahal niya pala ang trabaho kaysa sa akin. We became toxic to each other. I became selfish and he worsened, his attitude is until we clashed and it ended."
"I was really sure when we both sober up and cooled off, we might be together again but he met you..." her eyes glanced at me, "I have never Dean smiled and laughed like that so, I was really jealous."
Wala akong masabi, tahimik lang siyang pinagmamasdan dahil ang tagal na no'ng huli ko siyang nakita.
"Hell, I thought he's in love with me before but he really isn't. Nasanay lang na nando'n ako kasi ikaw...ikaw lang 'yong nagpangiti sa kanya ng gano'n. Ikaw ang pinakasalan. Ikaw ang...hinahanap niya n-no'ng nagising siya."
"What do you mean?" I asked, "he was looking for you."
"He is," she nodded, "but I-I always caught him looking at you, just staring at you when you weren't looking. He may remember me but his heart knows you. I-I'm sorry but I got so jealous and became selfish. I grabbed that opportunity and ruined your image."
Doon na ako napabuntonghininga.
"I-I'm sorry, Philie." Her eyes swelled, "I-I was desperate, I lied to him so he'd despise you. I-I was just so hurt, I wanted someone to c-care for me again because I haven't felt that when he was gone. My family don't care for me, n-naghiwalay ang Dad at Mommy. T-they gave me everything but I never felt love kaya n-nasaktan ako..."
"I understand, Sam." I nodded at her, "but you know, you hurting does not mean you will also hurt other people. Kung ayaw mong nangyayari sa 'yo ang isang bagay, bakit mo gagawin sa kapwa mo?"
Her eyes swelled more as she lowered her head, "I-I'm sorry..."
"No matter how hurt you are does not justify and would never give you the right to inflict pain for others too." Bulong ko.
"I-I'm sorry..." she sniffed and held her cup of coffee more, "s-sorry because I r-ruined your marriage, k-kung hindi sana ako umeksena..."
"Is it true? You attempted to kill yourself that time when he came?"
Natigilan siya, nakita ko ang hiya sa kanyang mata hanggang sa tumango siya ng paulit-ulit sa akin at mas bumuhos ang luha.
"I-I'm so sorry, Philie." She sniffed, "h-he won't talk to me no matter how much I tried, I-I wanted so bad to apologize and explain. I wanted to say sorry for hurting him physically, for manipulating his emotions but he won't..." umiling siya.
"I understand where you are coming, Sam." I nodded, "kagaya nga ng sinabi ko, mahirap ang hindi kilala ang totoong magulang pero walang mas mahirap sa kilala mo nga sila pero wala ka namang maramdamang nand'yan sila."
She nodded, nagulat ako nang hulihin niya ang kamay ko at pisilin.
"T-thank you," she muttered, "f-for understanding me. I learned my lesson now, 'di na ako...uulit."
I felt sad for her, she had to go to hospital to heal and I was mad at her before, for doing that pero ngayon, awa na lang ang nararamdaman ko.
"Sorry," she murmured, "I-I'm so sorry to you and Dean. Promise, promise, hindi na ako manggugulo."
"I won't say it is okay because it wasn't, Sam." I squeezed her hand, "but mistakes are normal, as long as you're learning from it. As long as hindi mo na uulitin. I forgive you."
"Thank you..." she burst out in tears, nagulat din ako at ang mga tao nang humagulgol siya nang tumayo siya at yumakap sa akin. "Thank you, Philie. Thank you."
Forgiveness is hard but giving it to people who wronged you wholeheartedly and sincerely is harder but I am happy because I was strong enough to give it to her.
She then offered to watch a movie with me at mukha namang sinsero siya kaya sumama na ako. She would tell me things and I would interact with her and smile.
"Thank you, Philie. Regards na lang kay Dean." She smiled and looked at my stomach, "I hope your baby would grow up with a complete family."
Gabi na siguro nang matapos ang movie at nang ayain niya akong ihahatid pauwi ay hindi ako pumayag kaya umalis na rin siya but right when I was about to call a cab, I remembered my phone and got confused when I saw the missed calls from him.
Babe calling...
Nagtataka, sinagot ko iyon at nagulat nang marinig ang galit na boses nito.
"Where the hell are you, Philomena?!" his voice roared in the other line.
"Huh?" I asked, "mall?"
"Sinong kasama mo?" he asked, enraged and panicking. "Is it Samantha?!"
Nagulat ako, napakurap-kurap ako at napaisip kung paano niya nalaman. I didn't tell him I'm meeting her, I know he won't allow me. I know it was risky but Samantha sounded sincere and I wanted to close that part of me in life. I won't like to be mad forever.
"How did you know—"
"Shit, shit..." he cursed more, "where are you? I am tracking your phone, Philie. Are you still in the mall?"
"Oo?" nagtataka kong sagot at hinawakan ang tiyan, nagsisimula nang kabahan.
"Where are you? Kasama mo pa ba siya?" seryoso niyang tanong, naririnig ko pa ang busina kaya nangunot ang noo ko.
"Dean Angelo, are you driving?!" my voice raised.
"I am asking you, Philie! Are you still with her?!" mas kinabahan ako sa diin ng boses niya na tila may kinatatakutan o ano.
I looked around and felt chills when the cold wind touched my skin.
"N-no..." I shook my head, feeling creepier now when I felt like I'm being watched. "W-wala, Gelo. Kumalma ka, tatawag ako ng cab at uuwi na."
"I didn't know she'll be released this soon." He sighed, "nasaan ka? Don't move. I'm near the mall."
"Okay," I nodded and looked around, marami namang nag-aabang ng sasakyan kaya medyo kampante ako. "Ano bang mayro'n?" I asked and touched my stomach more.
"Are you sure you're okay?" he asked, "if she came back, don't come with her—"
"Ano ba kasing mayro'n, Angelo?" naguguluhan ko ng tanong, "I'm nervous now, you won't tell what it is!"
"Just..." he sighed but then cursed again when I heard a loud honk from a car in the other line.
"Dean Angelo, careful! You are driving!" I hissed, "tell me what it is. I am fine, marami akong kasama kaya walang mangyayari sa akin."
"I'm here." He said in panic at narinig ko ang pagsara ng pinto ng sasakyan niya, "where are you?"
"Nasa may pilahan ng cab," I answered, "calm down, okay? I'm fine, ano bang mayro'n?"
"She's the person who hit me, Philie!" he answered, startling me.
Gulat na gulat ako, naibaba ko ang phone na hawak ko at saktong pag-angat ko ng tingin ay nasa kabilang kalsada na si Angelo.
He noticed me and that's when he lowered his phone. He looks stressed and in panic, siya lang ang nag-iisa sa kabilang part ng kalsada kaya halos tumakbo na siya para lang mapuntahan ako pero hindi magawa.
I was stunned and still shocked. I saw how the streets lit from the red light to the go sign as it turned green. That's when Angelo took a step and ran towards my direction pero natulala lang ako nang masaksihan kung paanong may rumaragasang sasakyan ang nagtungo sa direksyon niya.
The screams from the people filled my ringing ears when my husband got hit at halos mapaupo ako nang makitang ang kulay berdeng ilaw na nagbibigay liwanag sa kalsada ay nahaluan ng pula mula sa kanyang dugo.
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