Dear Romarjo
May 12, 2020
Dear Romarjo,
It's been two hundred seven days since we last talked to each other. It's been so long since we had our conversation, but still, my feelings for you didn't change. Even if we didn't talk, you're still here in my heart.
They said that If you got hurt, you'll change. But In my case, my feelings for you are still the same. I won't lie if I tell you that in the past few months... I'm still hoping. I'm still hoping that you will message me, or meet me while smiling. But I know it's just a faint hope. You won't come back to me. Even if I keep on telling myself that you won't be coming back, I still keep on holding on.
I keep wondering. I keep thinking....are you still thinking of me? I wonder how you are. I want to know if you're missing me as I do? I'm stuck here. I'm stuck here all alone while thinking of some what-ifs. What if we are still good? What if we are still together? What if we did work our relationship even if it's a long-distance relationship? We promised. I promised that we will fight all of the barriers, but what happened? We didn't succeed. You left me. You left me hanging in this...in our relationship.
You left me hanging... without any words... without explanations. Why? Why did you do that? You can at least tell me your reason... you should have told me why you ignored me. Whatever your reasons... whatever is it. I will understand. You should have let me know about it. If you want me gone or if you want to end our relationship then you should have said it. I will gladly understand if you explain it to me. You should have told to me your reason, not like this... as you left me hanging in the air.
And you're unfair. How could you forget me when I can't forget about you?
Too scared and vulnerable while thinking of you all the time. I'm hurting. It hurts so much. How can you make me fall in love with you...damn hard but didn't take any responsibility with it. How could you do this to me... But even if you do this to me I can't get mad at you. I'm confused, yes...but I'm not mad at you.
You said you love me. I believe you. I also fell in love with you.
You told me that you love me. How can you love me when you didn't even hesitate to hurt me?
You said you love me.
I sipped with your lies like it's my favorite drink. You taught me to love but you also cause me heartaches.
So, tell me did you love me or did you pretend to?
Every day... every hour...every minute.... every second... You're still popping into my mind. Every night... your memories keep on hunting me. Sometimes I still dreamed about you. You're my dream. Isn't it ironic that I dream about the reason why I can't sleep?
I have so many questions for you. Too many questions that I want to know your answers to. You left and disappeared. What happened to you?
I hope you're fine. I hope that you're safe and sound. Please be safe, my love.
Every time I do something you always have the guts to invade my mind. I want to forget you...in the past few months, I keep on trying to forget about you and move on. But it's been so many months, and I didn't succeed. I want to erase you from my system, on my mind, and heart. But I can't...I still can't, my panda. I'm so intoxicated by my love for you.
"I've made you for myself now" that was the exact words that you said. I agreed about what you said...it was true. You made me for yourself. It's like a curse....a good curse.
I still love you with all my heart, my love. It's still you. It's always you. It's you...that I will always love, my Romarjo. Unë të dua, my Albanian gangster.
But I had enough. I'm so tired of feeling this pain. I want to stop loving you. I want to be free. I want to be free from the pain that you've caused me. I deserve better. I deserve someone who's going to fight for me even if the world will be a hindrance. Today, May 12, 2020. I've promised myself that I will gonna forget you. Lamtumirë, my love Romarjo. Lamtumirë.
Yesterday was our supposed to be anniversary... May 11... Happy first anniversary, my love Romarjo. Let me free my heart and love for you.
Sincerely yours,
Rona May
-----
2020
Bạn đang đọc truyện trên: Truyen3h.Co